Posts Tagged ‘Suzie’

Gift Ideas?

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December 9th, 2010 Posted 8:47 am

“Here’s a stat,” Bernie says. Bernie’s very interested in stats, whatever those are. Suzie isn’t interested at all. “When you’re writing a story, Bernie, it’s the human element you want.” Suzie’s a reporter for the Valley Tribune, in case I haven’t made that clear already. “If taxes go up, for example, you sit down with Jane and Joe Public at their kitchen table and find out how they’re going to manage, what they usually have for supper on week nights and what they’re going to be having now, that kind of thing.”

Jane and Joe Public? Don’t remember being in their kitchen, or in fact anything about them at all.

“The stat, according to an AP-Petside.com poll,” Bernie goes on,”is that 56% of dog owners – hate that concept – plan to give their dogs a gift this holiday season, as compared to 48% of cat people. Both those numbers seem low.” He turns to me. “Anything particular you want for Christmas?” he says. “Hey! Down, big guy!”

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Plunderers Roll Up Their Sleeves?

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December 1st, 2010 Posted 8:59 am

“Might be a good idea to get back to the Astrid case,” Spence says.

“You think?” says Admin.

Uh-oh. Those dudes. They tend to get – what’s the word? – fractious? shirty? dyspeptic? I don’t know any of those words, although I know what a shirt is, having gnawed on several in the laundry pile. Also there are Bernie’s Hawaiian shirts. He looks so good in them! The other day Suzie gave him a shirt that wasn’t Hawaiian but he hasn’t worn it yet. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s lost.

“But with the site revamp and all,” Spence says, “maybe there are some newbies. We should give the readership a sort of synopsis of events so far. Like – Colonel Bob hired C&B to etc. etc. and then they went to etc. and etc. happened and after that etc. etc. which brings us to etc.”

Admin gives him a long look. “Sounds to me like a job for the Plunderers.”

Spence smiles and gives Admin a fist bump. All of a sudden they’re getting along. Those dudes!

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Happy Thanksgiving

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November 25th, 2010 Posted 8:18 am

Happy Thanksgiving to all the Plunderers, all readers of this blog, and everyone who has been reading the stories about me and Bernie. Also to anyone who cares about the nation within the nation.

Right now we’re up and doing, Bernie, me, Suzie. We’ve all got our individual jobs. Mine is security. A squirrel invaded the yard but I handled that and now everything’s quiet. Soon Rick Torres is coming, bringing some kids from a homeless shelter, and we’ll be playing football. Touch football, which means no tackling. I had a hard time remembering that last year, but I know I’ll do much better today.

The only bad thing is we don’t have Charlie this year. He, Leda, and Malcolm are headed down to Cabo. Except, whoa, what’s this I see out the window? Leda driving up? With Charlie beside her? And no Malcolm?  So therefore? I don’t know. Bernie handles the so therefores. That’s part of the reason for the success of the Little Detective Agency.

Cheers, everybody!

Please note: Mike Baker will be running some tests on the blog over the holiday.

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Iggy For President?

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November 13th, 2010 Posted 9:23 am

Rick Torres came over last night with his new girlfriend. Her name’s Lucinda and she’s not that comfortable around me and my kind. You pick that up right away here in the nation within. They all started talking politics, whatever that is – Bernie, Suzie, Rick, Lucinda. Sometimes human voices start rising, first one, then another, and soon they reach an unpleasant volume. What they were talking about was kind of hard to follow, but one thing I picked up on was pretty exciting: there are blue dogs in politics! Maybe not as many as there used to be, but still: I’m for them. I’ve never actually seen a blue dog before, although come to think of it, Iggy can look kind of bluish in certain lights.

There he is at the window now. I stare at him. He stares back. He is looking a bit bluish today. I’ve never thought of Iggy as the leader type, but maybe I’ve been wrong all this time. Now he’s prancing around. What’s that he’s got in his mouth? That bedroom slipper? I can almost taste it, I want it so bad. Is that what politicians do, tease you with bedroom slippers?

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