Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘Santa 365’

Last Minute?

Last minute holiday-themed stocking stuffers of a digital nature required? Here are two possibilities: Santa 365, a Chet and Bernie short story – $2.99. And It’s A Wonderful Woof, a Chet and Bernie novel on sale for the next two days for $2.99. That’s under 6 bucks for both! There’s a beer I like at a local spot that costs that! (Not including tip.)

Beginnings (Not)

Sunday is when we do beginnings, taking a look at the start of a Peter Abrahams novel, including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker™. But today how about an excerpt from Santa 365, a Chet and Bernie short story some folks like to read at this time of year? It’s available on digital and audio form, and this little passage seems relevant.

“Remind me of your sentence, again?” Bernie was saying.

“Four years,” Plumpy said.

“We can’t be even close to that.”

Plumpy nodded, one of those enthusiastic nods that make jowls wobble on humans that have them, which Plumpy did. “Paroled after eight months,” he said, “on account of overcrowding.”

“So you did eight months – “

“Less six weeks on account of good behavior.”

“ – for stealing one point two million dollars?”

“Stealing puts it in such a harsh light, doncha think?”

“But that’s what a Ponzi scheme is,” Bernie said.

Beginnings (There ain’t no sanity clause.)

Sunday is when this small business takes a look at the start of a Peter Abrahams novel, including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker™. Since we’re in the holiday season for sure – satellite radio tuned at the moment to the Country Christmas channel – how about we go with Santa 365, the C&B Christmas e-short story, perhaps a good way to introduce a newcomer to the series? (As some of you may have noticed, this small business likes turning out dialogue from time to time.)

“There’s no Santa Claus,” Charlie said.

“Who told you that?” said Bernie.

“Esmé.”

“Who’s Esmé?”

“At school.”

“Well,” said Bernie, “everyone has their own opinion.”

“It’s not an opinion, Dad,” said Charlie. “It’s a scientific fact.”

“Oh?”

“From a scientist.”

“Any scientist in particular?”

“Groucho Marx.”

“Esmé told you that?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Know much about Groucho Marx?”

Charlie shrugged his skinny little shoulders. “He was a scientist and he said there ain’t no Santa Claus.”

“What do Esmé’s parents do?”

“Drive her to school. Pick her up.”

“I meant for a living.”

“Like you’re a private eye?”

“Yeah. Like that.”

“I don’t think they’re private eyes,” Charlie said.

“Why not?”

“They’re rich.”

 

 

Jumping the Gun?

I’m hearing a lot of holiday music already. Is it too early for holiday reading? Here are the holidays plus Chet and Bernie in both short story and novel form.