Posts Tagged ‘To Fetch A Thief’

Chetspeak on Sunday


November 27th, 2016 Posted 8:52 am

“How about Peanut?” Bernie said. “Does she have any enemies?”

“Is that a serious question?”

“Not really,” Bernie said. “But if she does, look out.”

“Why is that?”

“Because an elephant never forgets.”

Whoa right there. An elephant never forgets? Had I heard that before? Couldn’t quite recall. What was Bernie saying? Not that elephants are in some way better than – ? My mind dug in its heels, wouldn’t go any further in that direction.



Happy Thanksgiving, Everybody!


November 24th, 2016 Posted 8:42 am

Rick Torres crouched under a strip of tape, came toward us, shook hands with Bernie. “Hey, Chet,” he said, and gave me a pat. “Lookin’ good. Is he still growing, Bernie?”

“Hardly seems possible,” Bernie said. “This is my son Charlie. Shake hands with Sergeant Torres, Charlie.”

Rick held out his hand. Charlie gazed down at the ground.

“I won’t bite,” Rick said. Of course he wouldn’t! Hardly any humans did, their little teeth not being much of a weapon. I did remember a perp named Clancy Green chomping on some other perp’s arm, but that was on a Halloween night, the only holiday I don’t like – Halloween brings out the worst in people, Bernie says. Thanksgiving is my favorite, except for that one time with the drumstick incident, maybe a story for another day.

– from To Fetch A Thief.


Chetspeak on Sunday


November 20th, 2016 Posted 8:14 am

A light shone down in the darkness behind Colonel Drummond, music played ta-da!, and there stood an elephant and a man in a tight sparkly costume. I knew elephants from Animal Planet. Would I ever forget the show they did on when good elephants go bad? And that whole house falling down? The man in the sparkly costume – Uri DeLeath, unless I’d missed something – had a big smile on his face, a dark face with big dark eyes and one of those pencil mustaches, always interesting. He looked tiny next to Peanut. Peanut’s face was hard to read. I couldn’t get past that trunk, so amazing. Peanut raised one of her huge front feet. Uri DeLeath lay down under it. Peanut lowered her foot onto him, just touching and no more. After a moment or two, she raised it, stepped back, and in one quick but gentle motion of her trunk scooped him up and set him behind her head. Then Peanut started walking around the ring, Uri DeLeath smiling and waving his sparkly hat, and what was this? Peanut reaching her trunk into the stands and grabbing somebody’s popcorn right out of the bag and offering it up to Uri DeLeath? He ate a handful and then Peanut’s trunk curled to her mouth and she scarfed down the rest, and … and now she was, yes, kind of prancing, like she’d pulled a fast one. Hey! I knew that prance, meaning Peanut and I had something in common.



Chetspeak on Sunday


September 25th, 2016 Posted 9:35 am

“Good news or bad?” said Winkleman.

Bernie put the laptop on the table, turned it so Winkleman could see, and plugged in the camera. “These are in sequence,” he said, “time stamped at the bottom left.”

Winkleman looked at the pictures, his face gray in the laptop’s light. His sad eyes got sadder. “Who is he?” he said.

Bernie was silent for a moment. Then he said, “Does it really matter?”

Winkleman thought. His thoughts weren’t like soft breezes, were more like dark shadows that I didn’t want near me. “Guess not,” he said. “What’s the point?” He put his head in his hands. This happens sometimes, maybe like the human head can get to be too much to support.



The Books

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