Posts Tagged ‘To Fetch A Thief’

Chetspeak on Sunday

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February 7th, 2016 Posted 7:11 am

I ran onto the loading dock. Still some light left and I could see Peanut clearly. She was on the ground, walking toward the perp’s old – what was the word? – jalopy. That was it. She walked over to the jalopy, lifted one of her huge round feet and stomped down, crushing the whole front end. Why? I had no idea, but I liked it, liked it a whole lot. Then Peanut raised her trunk high and blew a beautiful trumpeting sound up toward the darkening sky. I loved that trumpeting sound – as good as Roy Eldridge or better – and was hoping for more, when the baboon blew right by me with a whoosh of air, flew out into the night and disappeared from view, although not before I saw that he had the sombrero.

I jumped down onto the ground and went over to Peanut. This was the Peanut Case, meaning she was my responsibility. First I had to get her attention. That probably meant waiting until she’d finished crushing the jalopy’s back end. It didn’t take long.

– from TO FETCH A THIEF.

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Chetspeak on Sunday

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January 10th, 2016 Posted 8:18 am

“Okay, Popo,” Rick said, “let’s hear your story.” The uniformed cop went to the doorway and stood there, looking out. Rick sat down, reaching for his notebook. Bernie leaned against the desk, arms folded across his chest. I sat on the floor beside him, picking a spot that turned out to be sticky. I shifted over a bit; that was better.

“Well,” said Popo, “my great-great-grandparents, in search of a better life, came to Ellis Island early in the twentieth – “

“How about we fast forward to the events of last night?” Rick said.

A quick smile crossed Bernie’s face, not sure why. But I got the feeling he was having fun, which put me in a very good mood, and I’d been in a good mood already.

Popo nodded, the big red ball at the tip of his nose bobbing up and down. Balls are a big interest of mine; I couldn’t take my eyes off it.

– from TO FETCH A THIEF.

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Chetspeak on Sunday

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October 18th, 2015 Posted 7:52 am

Bernie switched on the bedside light, a dim brownish light that left the corners of the room in shadow, even though it was a pretty small room. He tried the overhead light; it didn’t work. I sniffed around. There’d been a man and a woman in here, but not recently, and they’d had a burger or two. Other than that, nothing of note. Then I spotted a strange picture on the wall, a picture of a bull and a dude dressed up in a glittery costume. The dude held a sword and seemed to be about to stab the bull with it. Could that be? I tried to look away but couldn’t, at least not for long. Has that ever happened to you? Meanwhile Bernie was unpacking, pouring water in my bowl, brushing his teeth. Those little teeth humans had – they brushed them every day for some reason. Mine are big but only get brushed when Janie’s Pet Grooming Service – We Pick Up and Deliver comes to visit. So: the smaller the teeth the more you need to brush them? Was that it?

– from TO FETCH A THIEF.

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Chetspeak on Sunday

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October 11th, 2015 Posted 8:29 am

The heel is down at the foot: I was pretty sure of that, because when Bernie says heel, which he really never has to, I walk along right beside his feet. The head is the head, at the top. So head over heels means what? The head is always over the heels, except in an upside-down situation, for example when a perp by the name of Nuggets Bolliterri tried to escape on us from an upstairs window and ended up dangling head-first in a tangle of tied-together sheets. Leda had just said Malcolm was head over heels. Meaning what? He was tangled in tied-together sheets? I couldn’t take it any further.

– from TO FETCH A THIEF.

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