Posts Tagged ‘Thereby Hangs A Tail’

Chetspeak on Sunday


September 10th, 2017 Posted 8:25 am

“Call him off!” the perp screamed. “I give up.”

Bernie came running up from behind. “Good work, Chet,” he said, huffing and puffing. Poor Bernie – he was trying to give up smoking again, but not having much luck.

“Get him off! He’s biting me!”

“Chet wouldn’t bite,” Bernie said. “Not deliberately.”

“Not deliberately? What are you – “

“On the other hand, round about now he usually likes to hear a confession.”



Memorial Day


May 29th, 2017 Posted 9:38 am

We remember.


“Where does it say I have to see your sorry face again?” Bernie said.

“Right back at ya,” said Colonel Bob. He strode up to Bernie. Was a fight about to break out? Colonel Bob was a big guy, bigger than Bernie. I got ready. But instead of a fight the two of them shook hands, and then Colonel Bob pulled Bernie close and they started slapping each other’s backs real hard. Colonel Bob turned to the other pilots and said, “Gonna need that bottle of JD from my office. Weren’t for this asshole you wouldn’t have to be putting up with my bullshit.”

“Why is that, Colonel?” said one of the pilots.

“Son of a bitch saved my goddamn life, is why,” said Colonel Bob. “Say hi to Bernard Little.”

Bernie’s name was Bernard? I was just finding that out now? What the hell was going on?


Random Amazon Review We Like


November 4th, 2016 Posted 7:57 am

5.0 out of 5 stars – Chet is charming. A wise and witty Canine copilot! – Oct. 30, 2016.

Arlene Millman on THEREBY HANGS A TAIL:
Chet’s narration sets this book apart, as an interesting look into the mind of a dog. How he thinks is uncluttered by pre-conceived notions. His loyalty to Bernie is unconditional. How Chet views the world, including the people/animals in his environment, gives the reader a different dimension, which I find extremely insightful, thought provoking and entertaining. Chet is uniquely canine, with his superior sense of smell, hearing, vision, speed, not to mention his strength and teeth! Chet is a rare combination of honesty, wisdom and wit, with an unfussy appetite, including an eclectic diet ranging from crullers to hotdogs to steak. His enthusiasm for adventure, napping, and solving mysteries with his “partner” Bernie, knows no bounds. Chet is ready for action, loves life, possessing confidence uncluttered by ego. I only wish Spencer Quinn would continue writing this series, which only consists of 8 books at the moment. What about a movie adaptation? Meanwhile, I will continue to re-read the books in existence, and appreciate Chet’s lack of concern for ears that don’t match, and his charming tolerance for Bernie’s foibles.


Chetspeak On Sunday


September 18th, 2016 Posted 7:23 am

The huge dark eyes shifted over to Bernie. For the first time that I’d seen, Princess began to move under her own power. Hard to describe it, exactly. Her little legs were going quite fast, a quick trot, you might call it, or even running, but she was hardly getting anywhere. She reached the edge of the tarmac –

“Not on the ground, Princess,” said Adelina. “It’s dirty.”

– and kept on, around a dusty thick-leaved plant – where I’d have lifted my leg, for sure, and almost to the Porsche. Princess gazed at it, then trotted back, her legs almost a blur. And her eyes: was that an anxious look I saw? I was almost feeling sorry for her – how crazy was that? – when she regained the tarmac and stopped near Bernie. Then, eyes right on him, but expressionless now, at least as far as I could tell – she squatted.

“Good girl,” Adelina said.

A yellowish pool began to spread across the tarmac. It got bigger and bigger, shockingly so. The smell was – I’ll admit it – fascinating. But that wasn’t the important part. The important part was the fact of the yellowish pool expanding quickly, the lead edge closing in on Bernie’s shoes, black leather lace-ups with an interesting smell of their own, speaking of smells. We’ll save that for later. The point now was that growing lake on the tarmac and the way Princess kept her eyes on Bernie the whole time.

“A long flight,” Bernie said, stepping away.

Princess did something I’d never seen before. Still squatting, with no interruption of flow, she shifted, kind of like a crab, in his direction.

“I think she likes you,” Adelina said.



The Books

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