Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘shorting pasta’

Financial Advice (More)

“Lost our AAA rating?” says Spence. “The whole country?”

“Yup,” says Admin. “Probably grounds for not paying taxes – it’s not a safe investment anymore.”

“Let’s leave that idea on the shelf for now. What about Bernie’s futures scheme?”

“Shorting pasta on the assumption that Italy’s going down the tubes? I like Wookie’s take – that’s the al dente plan.”

“But is that what to do? Make bets on things getting even worse?”

Admin sips his coffee, says nothing.

“How about we take Audrey for a walk, now that she’s been cleared by the vet?” says Spence.

“That’s the ticket.”

Welcome 2 Bizzy Lizzy, Pickles, Pink Collar Dude, Cooper, Buddy and Wolfie.

Financial Advice

Bernie’s up early, sipping coffee, tapping away at the computer. “Economy’s in trouble, big guy. But here’s what to remember – you can play it either way. That’s the beauty of capitalism.”

Oh, no.

“For example, looks like Italy’s going down the tubes. Too bad – I always wanted to go there. But you can’t get emotional about this.” He picks up the phone. “Waldo?” he says.

Waldo – our new financial adviser. Bernie says that story about him in the paper made something or other look worse than it was.

“Waldo? Got a question for you. Is there a futures market in pasta? If so, I want to short pasta. Big time, Waldo. Everything we’ve got.”

I look around for something to gnaw on.