Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘Portia’

A Job Well Done?

“I’m feeling a little used,” Bernie said, handing both film cans over to Kelo Printz.

“Sorry about that,” Kelo said, “but take comfort in the knowledge of a job well done.”

Whoa. Did that mean we weren’t getting paid? Our finances were a mess. Wasn’t Kelo the client? He was acting like a perp.

“Why is your dog growling like that?” Kelo said.

“Because he’s about to take a chunk out of your leg, you jerk,” said Portia.

Not a bad idea! Portia was growing on me.

Iggy’s Star Turn – Coming At Last

“I think,” said Bernie, “that we’re going to have to go back out to Death Valley and explore that cave, or what’s left of it. Meanwhile we’re not going to let these two film cans out of our sight.”

“What about all these people?” said Suzie. Meaning Freddie and Trimmer on the floor, Portia standing in the corner.

“That’s a problem,” Bernie said. “We’ll have to turn them over to the cops.”

“Charged with what?” Portia said.

Bernie thought. While he was thinking, I watched Iggy out the window, running free at last, yipping like crazy. Big mistake on my part.

Tempermental Birds

“Why is Kelo a moron?” Bernie said.

Portia gave him a long look. “I want a deal.”

“Okay,” Bernie said. “Where is he?”

“I don’t know.”

“For someone who wants a deal, you’re not very helpful,” Bernie said. “Tell me this – what was the goal, getting the film or getting the painting?”

“Why would we want the painting?” said Portia. I remembered that painting, tunnels and trains, kind of scary.

“It’s probably worth hundreds of thousands of dollars.”

Down on the floor, Freddie Dancer groaned. The human groan is an interesting sound. When perps groan I always know we’re getting somewhere. Bernie peeled the duct tape off Freddie’s mouth. Or maybe it was already off, or hadn’t been on in the first place. All I remembered was something about ducks, which turn out to be a tempermental type of bird.

“Speak, Freddie,” Bernie said.

And by the way, I’m loving having all these friends.

Facts Breezing By

Yes, how did Bernie know all that? When was Metro PD coming to take all these perps away? It was crowded in our front hall, and the air was getting a little stuffy. I like nice fresh air. Also, I’d smelled all the smells available, and there were plenty rising off Trimmer alone.

In fact, Bernie seemed to be talking to Trimmer at that moment. “The whole history must have been one of those family legends, a legend your sister here let you in on – was that before or after her divorce from Kelo?”

“After,” said Trimmer.

“Zip it,” said Portia.

“Why?” said Bernie. “After just proves your marriage had something going for it at least.”

“Kelo’s a moron,” Portia said.

“How so?” said Bernie.

Or something like that. This was getting hard to follow.

Note from Admin: Great pics coming in to Friends of Chet!