Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘petroglyphs’

The Explanation of Everything

Today I’m going to make everything clear about the Greed Case and the Petroglyph Case and answer all the other questions that come in down below, just as soon as Bernie gets done with the computer guy. They’re outside now, bent over some cables, and Bernie’s taking out a screwdriver and b@dksdokj&$%$%%^erdkfk$$qkmfqklmqf!!! …

Speak, Memory (More Clearly)

Lt. Stine changed his mind, came with us – me, Bernie, Suzie – to the Dry Gulch Steakhouse and Saloon after all. Has the Dry Gulch come up yet? Maybe in Dog On It? Or possibly Thereby Hangs A Tail? So much to remember! But the point is it’s a great place and they like me and I like them. At first – this was on the patio, the tiles nice and cool underneath me – I was so busy with the steak tips that I missed a lot of the back-and-forth, but it was all about the petroglyph thieves and Bernie asking them nicely to stop and then the knife came out and after that did the fur fly! Whatever that means, since I was the only one with fur and it remained on me the whole time, completely intact – and kind of thick and glossy, if you don’t mind me tooting my own horn. Whatever that means. How else would you play a horn? Not that I can, of course, but I love the trumpet, especially when Roy Eldridge is playing. Bernie says they called him Little Jazz, can’t remember why. But I almost can. It’s very very close. Do you ever get that feeling in your head?

Speak, Memory

Guess what – I slept right through Elvis gospel yesterday. How did that happen? 

Okay, where were we? Was Lt. Stine asking about those petroglyph thieves? Bernie didn’t like those petroglyph thieves, not one little bit, so neither did I, even though petroglyphs turn out to be nothing but rocks with scratches on them. Have I mentioned about how Lt. Stine was the guy who got me and Bernie together in the first place? The crack house where I was a puppy, the drunks, K-9 school, all that? Is anyone interested in any of this? The other day I remembered the whole thing, exactly! Every detail. Not now, for some reason.

Okay, where were we?

Lizard Men

“So,” said Lt. Stine, “my guess is you got into a little back-and-forth with the pertroglyph thieves.”

Bernie nodded. “We just tried to get the point across that those petroglyphs really belong to everyone and should be left intact. These were particularly nice – there was a lizard man and a couple with people on horseback, meaning they were late ones, after the Spanish came.”

“Why is that?” said Lt. Stine.

Bernie looked a little surprised. “Because the Spanish brought horses here.”

Hey! I was with Lt. Stine on this, hadn’t known that. I wasn’t a big fan of horses – such prima donnas – and so the Spanish, whoever they were, hadn’t done us any favors. 

“And I suppose these two thieves reconsidered their ways after you clued them in,” said Lt. Stine.

“Not right away,” Bernie said. “In fact, one of them pulled a knife.”

I remembered that very well, the long blade glinting in the sunshine.