Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘fake ID’

Beginnings (2)

On Sunday we do beginnings, taking a look at the start of a Peter Abrahams novel, including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker. Today is Monday! But yesterday we did the beginning of Bark vs. Snark, the Queenie and Arthur middle-grade mystery that comes out tomorrow (available to adults with fake ID). Since the story is told in alternating chapters from the viewpoints of Arthur (seen below in the middle) and Queenie (on one side of him or the other – you’ll have to read it to find out which) and chapter one is Arthur’s, we didn’t hear Queen’s voice. So here’s the start of chapter two.

“ARTHUR!”

What now? Do I ask for much? No, not me. Who could be more undemanding or easier to live with? All I want from life is a little peace and quiet. But now, somewhere outside but not nearly far enough away, we had Bro shouting a name that gets shouted fairly often in these parts.

By these parts, I mean the Blackberry Hill Inn and surrounding property. It’s a beautiful inn – which you probably guessed, since it’s mine, and I’m all about beauty. The inn is not mine alone, of course – I’m happy to share it with the rest of the family, meaning Mom, Bro, and Harmony. Bertha the cook is also on board – she’s in charge of pouring my fresh cream into my special China saucer, known as Queenie’s saucer, after which she whips up breakfast for the guests. It’s possible we haven’t had enough guests recently – I’ve caught a worried look on Mom’s face a few times – but what would be the point of me worrying about it? My job is to concentrate on, well, me. Me and me alone, and only me. But it can be hard to concentrate when –

“ARTHUR! STOP! WHAT GETS INTO YOU?”

What gets into Arthur: an interesting question.

Beginnings (1)

On Sundays we take a look at the start of a Peter Abrahams novel including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker.Bark vs. Snark, 3rd in the middle-grade (but adults with fake ID can buy them) Queenie and Arthur series, comes out on Tuesday.  Arthur (pictured here in the middle) and Queenie (to his left, or maybe right – you’ll have to read it to find out) tell the story in alternating chapters. Arthur leads off, so today we’ll do the start of Chapter One and then tomorrow – a special Monday version of Beginnings! – we’ll do the start of Chapter Two.

Ah, summer. My favorite season of the year by far, way better than … those other ones, the names not coming right off the bat. And here’s something you should know about me: whatever doesn’t come right off the bat, doesn’t come, period. So I don’t even bother trying to remember! Who needs bother? A life free from bother is the life for me! You should try it! But don’t try too hard. Trying too hard turns out to be bothersome all by itself. Nothing’s simple, as humans like to say, although it’s not the kind of remark I like to hear. I prefer “Who’s a good boy?” And “anyone want a treat?”

One Week From Today!

The adventures of Queenie and Arthur continue! Middle-grade but available to adults with fake ID. The book is very reasonably priced. (For fake ID please send $1000 in unmarked bills to this address.)

Sneak Peek!

Bark vs. Snark, 3rd in the middle-grade (but adults with fake ID can buy them) Queenie and Arthur series, comes out Oct. 6. Arthur (pictured here in the middle) and Queenie (to his left, or maybe right – you’ll have to read it to find out) tells the story in alternating chapters. Arthur leads off.

Ah, summer. My favorite season of the year by far, way better than … those other ones, the names not coming right off the bat. And here’s something you should know about me: whatever doesn’t come right off the bat, doesn’t come, period. So I don’t even bother trying to remember! Who needs bother? A life free from bother is the life for me! You should try it! But don’t try too hard. Trying too hard turns out to be bothersome all by itself. Nothing’s simple, as humans like to say, although it’s not the kind of remark I like to hear. I prefer “Who’s a good boy?” And “anyone want a treat?”