Chet The Dog

Posts Tagged ‘Bakersfield’

Envy

“He started spending more and more time up in Bakersfield,” Bernie said. Who was he talking about, again?

“Playing gigs?” said Colonel Bob.

“Yeah,” Bernie said. “He was pretty good. Afterwards my mother threw away all his stuff, but I found a tape of him just fooling around on an acoustic guitar, even singing a bit.”

“Afterwards meaning … ?” said Colonel Bob.

Hey! Was that Iggy at his window? Sure was! Hadn’t seen Iggy in ages. Iggy’s my buddy, although he never seems to come out any more. And he had something in his mouth. I went right up to our window for a better view. Was it a bedroom slipper? Looked like one. Iggy gave it a little shake. Yes, a bedroom slipper for sure. I wanted it real bad.

“Chet! Knock it off.”

I dialed down to this low rumble I have.

“This is a pretty amazing story,” Colonel Bob said. “What happened after that?”

Spence’s World Series pick: Tampa vs. Rockies

Buckaroos

Bakersfield comes up from time to time. There’s something called the Bakersfield sound. I think Bernie likes it and we listen sometimes when we’re in the Porsche. This isn’t one of those shiny new Porsches, in case I haven’t mentioned that already. The bumper sticker on the back is from Max’s Memphis Ribs, a joint I haven’t been to in way too long. But the point is the Bakersfield sound. There’s Buck Owens, for example – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1Ygm9bvjUE&feature=related. And Merle Haggard, one of Bernie’s all-time favorites – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffHcGlF0xDw. But what never gets talked about, and I only know because late that night when Bernie and Colonel Bob were talking and drinking a glass or two – or maybe more, but two is my limit for numbers – of bourbon, Bernie mentioned his dad. That never happens! But I was so sleepy. Something about how his dad went off to Bakersfield in the early days, played rhythm guitar in a band at the Blackboard with Bill Woods on piano and Buck Owens on lead. Then it all went bad. Was it because of … ? Nope. Can’t quite remember, although it’s very close, feels like it’s just around the corner. Does that ever happen to you?

Bernie’s 2010 World Series Picks: Tampa vs. Phillies.

A Tiny Scrap

“A few months ago,” Colonel Bob said, “I started getting the feeling I was being followed. You ever get that feeling?”

“A few times,” Bernie said. That kind of surprised me. We were the ones who do the following, me and Bernie. We’re partners in the Little Detective Agency. We’d cleared so many cases I didn’t even want to think about it, so I didn’t. Instead I sniffed around under the desk, found a tiny scrap of burned toast; sometimes Bernie had a snack while he worked. Crunch crunch and it was gone.

“So one day – this was in Bakersfield,” said Colonel Bob, “I pulled over and let the traffic pass. Third car  went by,  just an ordinary econobox, driver looking straight ahead. But the sight of him gave me a shock, no other word for it.”

“Because?”

“He looked just like me, Bernie,” said Colonel Bob. “Me at twenty-five.”

Sorry Rio had a tough day yesterday.

Spencer Quinn will be at the Westwood Library (Westwood MA) Thursday April 8, 7:30 PM.