Posts Tagged ‘bad taste’

Beginnings

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September 29th, 2019 Posted 8:44 am

On Sunday we do beginnings – taking a look at the first paragraph or two of a Peter Abrahams book, including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker. Because we just saw a Christmas ad (and thought, “Isn’t it a bit early?”) we’re going to do the exact same tasteless thing! So here’s the start of Santa 365, one of the four Chet and Bernie short stories available digitally.

“There’s no Santa Claus,” Charlie said.

“Who told you that?” said Bernie.

“Esmé.”

“Who’s Esmé?”

“At school.”

“Well,” said Bernie, “everyone has their own opinion.”

“It’s not an opinion, Dad,” said Charlie. “It’s a scientific fact.”

“Oh?”

“From a scientist.”

“Any scientist in particular?”

“Groucho Marx.”

“Esmé told you that?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Know much about Groucho Marx?”

Charlie shrugged his skinny little shoulders. “He was a scientist and he said there ain’t no Santa Claus.”

“What do Esmé’s parents do?”

“Drive her to school. Pick her up.”

“I meant for a living.”

“Like you’re a private eye?”

“Yeah. Like that.”

“I don’t think they’re private eyes,” Charlie said.

“Why not?”

“They’re rich.”

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