Poolside (4)

“Did it happen out here, Ray?” Bernie said. “Or in the house?”

Ray rubbed his face again. “Did what happen?”

“And you were too drunk to finish cleaning up?”

Ray gazed at the bloody towels. “I’m not drunk.”

“You stink of booze,” Bernie said. Good for Bernie, picking that up. Bernie’s nose wasn’t small for a human nose, but still. I love how he sometimes sniffs the air and says, “Smell anything, Chet?” Once it was a whole forest on fire!

“I haven’t been drinking,” Ray said.

Bernie walked off the pool deck, checked the lawn. It was a real nice lawn, kind of like a putting green. I’ve had lots of fun on putting greens, but more on that later. “Did you carry him all the way?” Bernie said.

“What are you talking about?” Ray said.

“The freezer,” said Bernie.

“Freezer?” said Ray. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Ray – I’m trying to help you.”

Ray shook his head, then winced, as though in pain. “Who are you, anyway?”

“My name’s – ” Bernie began, and then a siren sounded, not far away. Bernie went still. I went still, too, because he did.


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This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010 at 8:54 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

72 Responses to “Poolside (4)”

  1. AbbietheKitty
    5:25 am on June 22nd, 2010


    Set up.


  2. dawson
    5:26 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Chet: Ray doesn't know he's been drinking? He needs some "hair of the dog".

    Melanie: Is Gracie eating today? I put that last picture of her on my desktop at home. I keep trying to count them but the most I've gotten to is 11. There must be one buried under there that I can't see. I can see Greedy Guts. Any way you look at it – that's a lot of Newfie's!

    Rio: I hope you slept well on your very soft bed with your toys nearby and I hope your friend managed to sleep well also.

    B.Stover: I trust those Rio sounds you were making are gone.

  3. dawson
    5:28 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Staff: Safe trip home

  4. Riö - The Evil
    5:34 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Ray!…I bet he was hit over the head with something, poor sap!…grunt!… Whoever set him up has called the cops too!… crap!…Bernie better think quick if he is going to save Ray… wheeze!

    Hey!… Lil Lexi’s photos finally showed up on yesterdays comments!… snort!snort!… Maybe we will have a Princess of The Blog contest after all!… grunt!

  5. B. Stover
    5:44 am on June 22nd, 2010

    So who set Ray up? Did Bernie see signs of the body being dragged across the lawn? And Chet, I'd love to hear about the fun you've had on putting greens!

  6. Riö - The Evil
    7:10 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Albie!… I wonder how much longer we are going to be at Albie’s poolside? …snort!… Do you think Ray will land in jail on a bum murder rap?… grunt!

  7. B. Stover
    7:19 am on June 22nd, 2010

    I think Chet and Bernie will work it out eventually. Ray has to do some explaining.

  8. Melanie
    7:37 am on June 22nd, 2010

    But is Ray going to get a chance to explain? The sirens are near, Ray doesn't know what's going on BUT Bernie and Chet are still. They are waiting. Chet is waiting for Bernie. I don't know why Bernie is still. I remember when we lived near the coast, before really big storms, the ocean would be still. My guess is Bernie is about to move fast, really fast, but not as fast as Chet the Jet.

  9. Riö - The Evil
    7:54 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Well!… As stimulating as this all is… snort!…We have to go help her mother get gas and groceries… grunt!… Her mom has suddenly lost the ability to do anything by herself…sigh…I have a feeling it will be this way for a while.

  10. Mollypop
    7:57 am on June 22nd, 2010

    If the sirens they hear are the police, who called them?

  11. B. Stover
    8:24 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Apparently whoever set up Ray called the police. Of course, that is the question: Who set him up?

  12. Mollypop
    8:44 am on June 22nd, 2010

    I guess I thought that Albie had been dead for at least a few hours. Of course, the killer could have waited a while before calling the police.

  13. Melanie
    9:01 am on June 22nd, 2010

    If Ray was given a knock out drug, it could have been hours or not. Putting Albie in the freezer would mess up time of death. (I can be so CSI, snicker)

    But no insects or liver temp in there.

    Though on Chiller June 16th, Bernie didn't think Albie was completely frozen and Chet could still sort of smell Albie. BUT, the Pack can smell frozen meat with NO PROBLEM, as we know since they've stolen frozen roasts before.

    For awhile we had to bungee cord the freezer shut until they forgot they could open it.

  14. B. Stover
    9:06 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Hey, Melanie, maybe that's the reason for putting Albie in the freezer: to mess up time of death.

  15. Siberian Husky
    9:08 am on June 22nd, 2010

    I believe Ray, and I don't think he has been drinking. Maybe booze has been poured on him and around him. Yuk, the smell of booze is hard for even humans to miss. We've smelled forest fires. They smell good, like a campfire.

  16. Siberian Husky
    9:15 am on June 22nd, 2010

    HI Dawson! Mom has been to Prince George, but, of course, I have not.

    Melanie, How is Grace? That is funny about the Newfs and the freezer. I bet they haven't forgotten how. They are just being polite.

  17. Lexi
    9:25 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Wait, my pictures showed up! Oh, happy day! 🙂 SWEET!! 😛

    Abbie! You're SO right. It's a set up. The cops are on their way! Haha!



    RUN BERNIE AND CHET!!! Leave Ray. He's weird.

  18. Melanie
    10:27 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Cough, cough, whew, Siber-H, just catching my breath. Newfs polite? Around Food?


    Gracie is eating. Yet, what is coming out does not look great. Back to the vet tomorrow! He's going to try something out that they use for Pancreatitis. Wow, I didn't even need spell check for that one.

    I have a cute pic to put up of one of the pups, but I'm charging my iPod. Soon as it's ready to go, I can upload the pic from the camera. I really need two computers right next to each other.

    Lexi! Congrats! The next time you try to put up a picture, it might say (in red) waiting for monitor or something like that.

    Sam and Lexi, a difficult choice.

  19. Riö - The Evil
    11:14 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Hey!…We are finally back to our nice cool house… whew!… Has Sammie checked in today?… snort!…Where are we in the Princess of The Blog contest anyway?…grunt!…Has Ray been taken to prison yet??… sniff!… I feel like I’ve missed so much today!…cough!

  20. Riö - The Evil
    11:16 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Melanie!… It is a difficult choice between our two youngsters….snort!…That is why they have to work at convincing us why they are Princess of The Blog material… heh!

  21. B. Stover
    11:34 am on June 22nd, 2010

    I think Sam said she wants to be Princess in the movie not princess of the blog.

  22. Riö - The Evil
    11:49 am on June 22nd, 2010

    Oh!… Is this true Sammie?….cough!… You don’t really want to be called Princess around here?… grunt!… What a relief if this is true… heh! …Although I was kind of looking forward to the talent show… snort!

  23. Sam
    12:05 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Thank you B. – it's nice to have someone who's paying attention.

  24. Riö - The Evil
    12:20 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Stover!… I checked yesterdays comments and finally found the one where Sammie chickened out against Lil Lexi…snort!… I must have missed that one last night…grunt!..What with all the same time posting going on…shudder!…

  25. Melanie
    12:29 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    So are we having the contest? Or auditions?

    Here's a puppy on Gracie's paw.

    [img ]http://chetthedog.wpengine.com/wp-content/uploads/1277242146-IMG_1163.JPG[/img]

  26. Mollypop
    12:31 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Look at the size of Gracie's paw and that tiny baby!

  27. Siberian Husky
    12:39 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    That is so cute! Tell Gracie that we wish her luck at the vet tomorrow.

    This is just an idea…What if we declared Sam the one and only Princess for the movie, and Lexi could be the one and only Princess of the blog. We would be blessed with two Princesses then. (my mother chose the word, blessed, not me)

  28. Riö - The Evil
    12:41 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Rio’s soon to be ex-friend here. I finally got that video of him begging out on YouTube. This is a good time to post it because he is outside and when he comes back in, he will be distracted by the puppy photo. Ahhhhh! How cute! Please enjoy. He begged for hours, I swear that dog is stubborn and persistent. (I hope it works!)


  29. Siberian Husky
    12:55 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I don't dare say that I am laughing or Rio will get upset, and I know I shouldn't say it soo cute, but IT IS!

    The video worked perfectly for me and the quality is excellent..much better than some I have seen on YouTube.

    I'm going to watch it again. Don't feel bad, Rio. Most all dogs beg. We wouldn't be dogs if we didn't. One of the reasons humans love us…we are so cute.

  30. B. Stover
    1:06 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I hope Rio got the cookie. How could anyone resist those eyes?

  31. Mollypop
    1:06 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    After I saw Rio's ferocious look in that last picture, I said I couldn't call him Huggy Puggy any more, but not so! Mom wants to bring him here to live with us. Oh man.

  32. Melanie
    1:33 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Riö, the Pack is with you. They understand what the Nation within the Nation has to go through just to get a cookie. They said something about Humans, can't live without them, can't bite them. . . . something like that.

    Where was the cigar? Where were the nachos? Where was the beer?

    You're hiding them, right?

  33. Riö - The Evil
    2:00 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Grunt!… She TURNED THE COMPUTER OFF!… grumble!… She never does that for gosh sakes!…snort!… Now we have to go downstairs because she has to iron stuff before the Rockies come on!…gruff!… They are playing the Boston Red Sox tonight!… wheeze!…We are psyched big time because we suspect that the Charming Mr. Abrahams may well be a Boston Red Sox fan and he will be watching the game too!…WOOOOO! … Are you ready to clap as if your life depends on it SiberH?…. gruff!… I am!…But first the damned ironing…ugh!… Be back later!…snort!

  34. Siberian Husky
    2:06 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Yes, Yes, Yes, Rio!!! I will howl and woo woo. Remember, I have no rhythm. I am rhythm challenged.

    Rio, I am not giving anything away to tell you that the Boston Red Sox are the baseball team in, "The Fan"

  35. Lexi
    2:27 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Ha! I'm the Princess of the Blog, and also the Queen of the Bobs!! I'm so happy right now!! Yippee!!

    And I can also swim! YIP YIP!!

    Ha. I'd like to see Siber-H howl. I can't howl for my life, and Megan says all dogs should at least have an idea on how to howl, but apparently I don't. Any tips…??

  36. Lexi
    2:33 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    You guys are hilarious. 🙂 😛

  37. Siberian Husky
    2:33 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Lexi, We all have different gifts. I don't swim, but you can.

  38. Melanie
    3:01 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Hurumph, Bess is a Red Sox Fan!

    Oh, No!

  39. Lexi
    3:13 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Siber-H! You don't swim!? WHAT? I don't-CAN'T-believe it. At. All. 🙂 Want me to teach you some time? 😛

    $199.00 per month.

  40. Lexi
    3:14 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Just kidding! $199.00 per DAY. You won't need that long.

  41. Riö - The Evil
    3:30 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Lookit Lil Lexi!… The Princess is a red blooded Capitalist!…heh!… SiberH! I didn’t think we would EVER finish that ironing!…grunt!..She was so behind what with her mom needing her everyday for something…snort!… Now we are soooo ready for those Red Soxs! Those Boston Beans! Those Farty Pants Guys!… grump!…They took it all away from us in 2007 and we want revenge this series!…gruff!…aaaaaaaaawwwwww!… OUT! OUT!… I need OUT! now!…. yelp!yelp!

  42. Siberian Husky
    3:30 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Thanks for the expensive offer, Lexi, but I don't want to learn to swim. I HATE WATER

    On a calmer note, there is no point in my learning to swim because there is no water where I live.

  43. Melanie
    4:03 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Hey Riö, Bess wants to know how the RED SOX are doing!

    Good Night!

  44. Riö - The Evil
    4:08 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Bess!…We discussed this earlier way before this game….snort!…We agreed to disagree and then “try” and be happy for each others team no matter who wins… sniff…Its gonna be us, but I could not rub it in to her beautiful face…heh!heh!…grunt!

  45. Riö - The Evil
    4:10 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Finally!… She is finally done with all her freakin’ errands and we can sit down and enjoy the Rockies….Woooo!Woooo!… 0 – 0 so far bottom of the second so far…snort!…Uh oh! she's got a big pot of fire on the stove again and my eyes are starting to water… ugh!

  46. Riö - The Evil
    4:33 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Hey!…Boston had the bases loaded but the Rocks got them out before they could score!…wow!… Mr. Abrahams, I sure hope you are watching this tonight… snort!…I know it could go either way yet, but it is so fun going against “your team”….heh! heh!

  47. Siberian Husky
    4:44 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I'm here, Rio. So far, this is a more hold my breath kind of game than chewing my toenails kind of game.

  48. Staff
    4:53 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I am in Bismarck North Dakota tonight. The town is packed. We went to 4 motels before finding a room. It HAD to have free Wi-Fi and when I see what is on the blog tonight I am so-oooo glad it does.

    We are watching the Twins and the Brewers on TV. Milwaukee ahead 4 to 3 drat it all.

    Gosh I wonder why Rio is being kept so busy….Heh. I can't wait!


  49. Riö - The Evil
    4:58 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    AbbieTheKat!…Sometimes your Staff sounds like they have lost their flipping kat-nip minds… snort!… It is top of the 5th and still no score!…yeep!…Breath SiberH. Breath!…There could be a long night ahead of us!…Wooooooo!

  50. Staff
    4:58 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Gosh he is hilarious! You can tell he is really smart because when he isn't getting any action from the one person he gives the other one a look.

    Gosh give the poor baby a snack already.

    I heard someone say "stick to your diet" but most of it is too quiet for me to hear. Except for Rio. Him I hear. There will be hell to pay when he sees this.


  51. Riö - The Evil
    5:06 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Oh and Abbie!…We here are so glad the Twins might lose for a change!…wheeze!…What are you going on about? … grump!…Don’t you know I am trying to watch the Charming Mr. Abrahams team lose against the Rockies tonight!…That is all I want to concentrate on right now…dammit!..blast!

  52. Staff
    5:07 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Lexi, I went back and saw your photo's on yesterdays posts. You are one cute puppy. I am glad we aren't going to have a Princess-off. One for the movie and one for the blog. Learning to share is important.

    I hope BStover is better today. It does eventually get better. I hardly remember the root canal. Except for only being able to eat soft food.


  53. Riö - The Evil
    5:13 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Yaaaay!…The Rockies score first against the Boston Bean Boys!…Woooo!… 1 – 0 bottom of the 5th!…heh! whew!…cough!gag!spit!…. Wooooo!

  54. Staff
    5:42 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    OOOO The Twins are now behind 7 to 3. Ish. I think it is time for us to go find dinner.

  55. Riö - The Evil
    5:42 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Acch!…Boston Beans have the bases loaded again!… gaaaaa!… Hold onto your toes SiberH!…yelp!.. It is top of the 7th – 1 – 0 Rockies…gasp!

  56. Siberian Husky
    5:44 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    That dude stole home!

  57. Riö - The Evil
    5:48 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    OOOOOO!…The Rockies saved the inning!…WOOOO… bases were loaded and the Boston Beans could not Score!… SWEET!… oh my aching heart…wheeze!… I need my bed for a few minutes… grunt!

  58. Riö - The Evil
    5:50 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Heh!… Which game are you watching SiberH!…the Isotopes?..heh!

  59. Siberian Husky
    5:55 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Rio, I had to go out and mark a tree, but I thought someone stole home base and the score was 1-1. I come back in and find it was all a bad dream.

  60. Mollypop
    5:55 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I can't believe Mom is making me go to bed now. No fair. I want to have more fun right here.

    Good night all.

  61. Siberian Husky
    5:57 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    I am confused, but that is ok since it didn't really happen.

  62. Riö - The Evil
    5:59 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Gasp!… That Pot O’ Fire is hotter than ever tonight!…snort!…She is making that for either the “Winners” or “Big Time Losers” supper for after the trip to the mountain casinos tomorrow ….heh!… It is stinging my eyes and my nose is over-whelmed… gasp!…Back to baseball!.. snorkel!

  63. Riö - The Evil
    6:02 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Molly!!… Please stay!… This is our Authors team against my team!…snort!… YOU have got to stay!..please!..grunt!

  64. Siberian Husky
    6:02 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Good night Molly-sweet dreams. It is getting late in your time zone.

  65. Siberian Husky
    6:05 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    We don't have Dawson helping us either, Rio. I know she isn't really a Rockies fan, but she can be a big help.

  66. Riö - The Evil
    6:14 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Eck!… One of those Boston Beans just sneezed into his shirt neck…gross!…Do they not have Kleenex in the state of MA.???… Bottom of the 8th…still 1 – 0 Rockies…Helton is on first base!..yaa!…OHHH!…Just now 3 Boston Beans missed a fly ball…HEH!… two bases are loaded….Wait!!!… Now Rockies have all 3 Bases Loaded!…WOOOOOO!..

  67. Riö - The Evil
    6:24 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Ohhh!..My!… Top of the nineth and the Beans are up!… snort!… They need to score 3 runs to be ahead…aaaah…SiberH! It is toe nail biting time NOW…grunt!… I am chewing on the couch cover again…chomp!chomp!…. Lord of All Creation, please be with us! Amen!

  68. Siberian Husky
    6:28 pm on June 22nd, 2010


  69. Riö - The Evil
    6:37 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Gasp!…It is 2 – 1 Rockies, Top of the Nineth, 1 out…crap!.. ooooer !….Fly ball, now it is 2 outs!…heh! … Batter batter up!… sniff!sniff! … DO NOT WALK HIM…grrrrr!…

    GAME! GAME!! IT’S THE GAME… What a Play by Clint Barmes!! Wow! WE Beat those damn Red Soxs !….heh heh cough!…WOOOOO!

  70. Siberian Husky
    6:40 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Well, my gasp did the trick…ROCKIES WON!!

    Good night Friends Good night, Rio Your commentary makes the games so much more fun.

    Staff, have a safe journey on home.

  71. Riö - The Evil
    6:44 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Pheew-weee!… 2 freakin’ years later and we finally beat those guys..snort!..This feels really good tonight….grunt!… If we can take the series I will be in such a good mood forever!…woooo! wow!…Anything is possible now!…yeeep! Heh!snort! …Time for a good nights sleep finally! …sigh!

  72. Staff
    7:16 pm on June 22nd, 2010

    Well the Twins lost drat it all. We only got as close as 5 to 7. Those darn Brewers.

    See you all in the morning. Only 200 miles till home. Yay! I can't wait to see the Kats again. I have missed them.

    Wait till I tell Alice about the Tornado! And the Hail!


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