PAW AND ORDER: Chapter One, Excerpt Two
“Bernie? You called?” Hey! It was Suzie. Hadn’t heard her voice in way too long, although it usually sounded warmer than this. Suzie had been Bernie’s girlfriend, back when she’d worked for the Valley Tribune, the Valley being where we lived—maybe in Arizona, a detail I’d picked up quite recently—but then she’d gone away to take a job with the Washington Post, a no-brainer Bernie said.
“I, um, ah,” Bernie said. “Sorry.”
“You’re saying you’re sorry?”
“Uh-huh.”
“For what?”
“For what didn’t happen,” Bernie said. For what didn’t happen? This was hard to follow. My mind wandered to a morning not long ago when Suzie had arrived suddenly at the houseboat where Bernie and I had stayed while working the Ralph Boutette case and found Vannah on board. Vannah: a story for another time, but I should probably mention that tiny bikini and how the straps kept slipping no matter what she did. My mind wandered on to something else, namely barbecue, and when it came back, Bernie was saying, “. . . crazy to let silly misunderstandings come between us.”
“How about serious misunderstandings?” Suzie said, her voice still pretty cold.
“Them, too,” Bernie said.
There was a pause, and then Suzie laughed. Soon they were both laughing. I like watching humans laugh when they’re on the phone, especially when they laugh their heads off and somehow keep the phone in place the whole time. As for what this conversation was about, you tell me. It went on for some time, and then I put my paw on Bernie’s knee, just reminding him about what we were here for, namely barbecue.
Bernie glanced at me. “I’ve got a feeling Chet’s hungry,” he said.
“That’ll be with a capital H,” Suzie said, losing me completely. But maybe not Bernie. He laughed again. What fun we were all having! I pressed a little harder with my paw.
“So,” Bernie said.
“So,” said Suzie. After that came a long pause. Then she went on. “What’s next?”
“Headed home,” Bernie said.
“Happy trails,” said Suzie.
– from PAW AND ORDER, coming Aug. 5
Welcome new friends Minnie, Jama, Jasper, Token, Mr. Maximilliano. Stay tuned for Friend of the Month announcement later today!
Tags: excerpts, Paw and Order
This entry was posted on Friday, August 1st, 2014 at 7:43 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
8:00 am on August 1st, 2014
But we know they don’t go home, don’t we? Thus the cover showing D.C. Chet has his priorities – bar-b-q first.
Little walks are coming up then Barb is off to get wonderfluffed, and then she is attending a program at the fair grounds. Josh is getting some sort of award from the county for his contribution to the community. No details known at this point.
8:03 am on August 1st, 2014
BTW, we don’t have enough self control to skip the excerpts from PAO. And Chet is in his usual form – upright, alert and professional. Loving it so far.
8:19 am on August 1st, 2014
Good morning, B&M and everyone! Welcome Ozzie as the Dogust Friend of the month. Barb mom is like you, HAS to read the sneak peeks 🙂 “Laughing their heads off”…what an expression (but better than “keep your eyes peeled”).
Have a friendly Friday.
8:22 am on August 1st, 2014
I am skipping the excerpts, and most of what youse guys are posting. I am in WAIT mode for August 5th! But I hope I don’t miss any important news from you all.
Speaking of wait mode, here I am waiting for fun at Pints for Pups!

8:25 am on August 1st, 2014
How do you do it Howlers mama? No way could we skip all that fun!
Did you notice that new friends Jasper and Token must be in the same household? One big clue.
8:31 am on August 1st, 2014
Heh Heh! Good eye, Maggie!
8:37 am on August 1st, 2014
Staff, when TM/OFA went on tour last year he has his passport, at least in Atlanta

9:19 am on August 1st, 2014
Greetings!
B&M, I caught that, too. It also seems as if one of those guy’s head is missing.
Mama Meash, That is a wonderful picture of you, and would look very nice on a particular camera.
Belle Starr, The Giant may be hot (boy, is he!!), but you are the Sparkly Queen of Adorableness!!! Yes, you are!
10:04 am on August 1st, 2014
HoHo!…Are you saying that Spencer had his passport with him on tour?…snort!…Maybe I should take my special stamp that no one has seen yet with me when I go to meet that ole Spencer and The Charming Mr. Abrahams…wheeze!
10:09 am on August 1st, 2014
Rio, it can’t hurt!
10:19 am on August 1st, 2014
Perhaps we should remind OFA/TM, Spencer Quinn/Peter Abrahams (what a mouthful) to pack his passport for this year’s book tour since he’ll probably see a couple of Plunderers on his travels.
Admin., Mrs. and anyone else close by OFA, please remind him to pack it.
10:21 am on August 1st, 2014
Memory!…I’m pretty sure he will forget it…sniff!
10:22 am on August 1st, 2014
Paw!…I can always stamp his big ole paw instead…heh!heh!
10:30 am on August 1st, 2014
I like the way Chet keeps Bernie on track.
Good morning all.
10:30 am on August 1st, 2014
And give him a slurpy kiss 🙂

to go along with his stamp (see the 2 passports in the foto?)
10:46 am on August 1st, 2014
Good morning all.
Bee – you guessed it. It was Suzie (who is not your favorite) on the phone.
10:47 am on August 1st, 2014
Snort!…Okay then, I will have my stamp and my passport…heh!heh!
10:54 am on August 1st, 2014
Fotoz!…My friend says what she really needs is someone who can operate a camera…sniff!…As I cannot and will not be her personal photographer when she gets up to the little table with all her bags and bags of books…bah!
11:08 am on August 1st, 2014
Staff: I’ve responded to your email.
Charlie: I’m looking forward to reading Paw with you.
11:20 am on August 1st, 2014
Stopping by to say Bye for Now.
It is truly a Friendly (Skies) Friday here 🙂
11:22 am on August 1st, 2014
RIO! Maybe one of the store employees will be nice enough to take a picture of youse. I am both jealous and excited for youse!
11:24 am on August 1st, 2014
AND maybe it could be on the Plunderer’s calendar. heh!
11:25 am on August 1st, 2014
Tracking!…Bear just reminded me I am on tracking duty all by myself today…grump!…Maskers is going on vacation with Nana starting today!…yeeep!
11:25 am on August 1st, 2014
Someone here is frantically attending to last minute trip details.
Hope to talk to all youse soon (if wifi we can trust).
Over and out ^..^
11:26 am on August 1st, 2014
Bear, I will miss you all! Have a safe flight, a nice vacay, and take good care of Nana.
Hey, is Rio tracking your flight?
11:27 am on August 1st, 2014
Rose!…Doubtful. Very doubtful…snuff!
12:39 pm on August 1st, 2014
Meashka, Love the photo of you but it looks like you have already had a few.
Did any of you receive a email from Amazon wanting you to take a survey about your online book buying habits? I think it is legit, but I emailed Amazon asking them if it is.
12:46 pm on August 1st, 2014
Amazon!…I just placed an order for a book written by The Charming Mr. Abrahams I somehow over-looked…snort!snort!…I thought I had read everything he has written, but NO!…Yippeeee!WOOOOO!…It will be in my paws next week!…gasp!
12:49 pm on August 1st, 2014
Rio? What is the book? gasp
Maybe I also overlooked it.
12:54 pm on August 1st, 2014
Book!…It is titled, “Pressure Drop”….snort!…He wrote it in 1989 before I was ever born!…wheeze!
12:58 pm on August 1st, 2014
Story!…As far as I can make out it is about Divers and Kidnappers…wheeze!…I can’t wait!!!
1:10 pm on August 1st, 2014
Ozzie!….Crap!Spit!…grump!
1:13 pm on August 1st, 2014
Yark! I haven’t read it either. I am off to Amazon.
1:19 pm on August 1st, 2014
Treat!…Finding a book written by the Charming Mr. Abrahams that I have not read is like finding a Christmas present I forgot to open…snorkel!
1:28 pm on August 1st, 2014
Hi, Rio & Siber-H.
Mom’s been SCUBA diving. While Mom was reading Pressure Drop, she couldn’t breathe.
Have fun, kids. Don’t forget to breathe.
Love the excerpts. I was going to wait till I had the rest of the book, but then I didn’t.
Happy Friday and safe weekend to Everybody.
1:45 pm on August 1st, 2014
ummm I wonder just how much of Pressure Drop takes place in the water. I’ll order the book for mom and she can tell me the non-scary parts.
Hi Bluekat!
1:49 pm on August 1st, 2014
Non-Scary!….heh!…Those parts will be few and far between I betcha!…snort!
2:39 pm on August 1st, 2014
Is the following announcement worthy? We think it is.
******************Announcement***************
Last night when our Lady and the Giant were speaking on the phone, our Lady said, “Give Harris a love from me.” Who is the Harris and is she moving in on our attention? We wondered.
Our lady may not be big on having a lot of rules—she gets that from us—but she has one rule she holds dear: when it comes to bring home a dog that may or may not need a second chance, don’t let the Giant ask questions you don’t want to answer. Apparently, the Giant learned this lesson but replaced Giant with Pixie. Our Lady didn’t ask many questions other than how old is she? Does she know I love her all ready? She’s a girl, right?
Our lady, the Chief Naming Officer of the kennel chose the pups name sight unseen. This dear girl will be named Harris after our own Hobbit as a thank you for her support and friendship. Thank you CHobbit. Now, we have a Harris of our very own.
Devil dog lessons begin as soon as possible.
3:17 pm on August 1st, 2014
B: Can you supply the cahors and water? I’m not allowed to blur with open or unopened containers. I will supply the oversized, floppy ears.
3:22 pm on August 1st, 2014
Charlie: I have an unopened bottle of Cahors and a bowl of water waiting, alongside with the easy chair.
Welcome Harris.
3:28 pm on August 1st, 2014
Harris!…Oh! CHobbit is going to be tickled pink right down to her furry little toes…snort!
3:30 pm on August 1st, 2014
Harris, what a wonderful name.
3:43 pm on August 1st, 2014
. Can’t wait to meet my namesake
4:00 pm on August 1st, 2014
We welcome the indomitable Harris to the Snowhook Family. Looking forward to pictures.
And we know how scary some of Mr Quinn’s scary scenes are. Wonder if Mr Abraham’s writing is that nail-biting.
4:08 pm on August 1st, 2014
Sniff. What an honor.
4:18 pm on August 1st, 2014
Boarding!…Nana and Maskers are boarding their aeroplane…yeeep!…Take-off in about 45 – 50 minutes…grunt!
4:43 pm on August 1st, 2014
We want to see a picture of Harris whenever anyone has the time to take it.
Are we going to get to see Nana’s plane on the green map?
4:55 pm on August 1st, 2014
SiberH!…Only if it takes off!…snorkel!
4:56 pm on August 1st, 2014
Taxiing!….Nana and Maskers are taxiing down the run-way…wheeze!
5:05 pm on August 1st, 2014
Harris! Yay, a puppy for our very own Hobbit.
We must have pictures immediately !
5:13 pm on August 1st, 2014
Harris is a character’s name and WE are sure Harris is a character, 🙂
5:41 pm on August 1st, 2014
Lucy Lou and Darah Thea, the black Canadians were just up top…tip top 🙂
5:44 pm on August 1st, 2014
Airborne!…Nana and Maskers are safely in the friendly skies…snort!snort!
5:53 pm on August 1st, 2014
WE wish we could go along on the trip to So Cal. Been a long time…10 years as of today 🙁
7:03 pm on August 1st, 2014
California!…Nana and Maskers are jetting over CA right now – they are almost to their destination!…snort!
7:04 pm on August 1st, 2014
ETA!…30 minutes till they start landing procedures…chuffle!
7:08 pm on August 1st, 2014
That was a short trip as the plane flies.
Thank you, Rio
7:22 pm on August 1st, 2014
Close!…They are very close now!! Ten minutes and counting!…Woooo!
7:36 pm on August 1st, 2014
Landed!….Our good friends have landed safe and soundly….whew!
7:37 pm on August 1st, 2014
Well, I attended the McHenry County Fair program and Josh was given his award. It was quite an honor! The Illinois Bureau of Tourism came out and gave a talk about tourism and then they said that every year they honor an individual who has contributed a lot to promote local business and tourism for the area. That person was Josh. He had no idea that he was getting the award, so it was really cool. He was speechless, which doesn’t happen often.
7:57 pm on August 1st, 2014
Congrats to Josh!
8:58 pm on August 1st, 2014
B&M, what an honor! You should be so proud of him 🙂
Glad that Nana is safe in So Cal. What a fun weekend we will have.
9:13 pm on August 1st, 2014
Hello Everyone–I’m still trying to catch up, blown away by the “Ballgame” picture and glad to hear that Nana and Co. have arrived safely.
Edgar, Conan and Ms. Pretty all newly wonderfluffed (I love that term) and A/C is working. I cross my fingers and hold my breath as things are going OK for now.
Aincerely hope the same holds true for all of you. (T and G’s Mama–how’s the mystery wound coming?)