Not Beginnings

On Sunday we do beginnings, taking a look at the start of a Peter Abrahams novel, including those written under the Spencer Quinn moniker. But not today! With pub date for Of Mutts and Men so close (7/7, meaning there’s still time to take advantage of the preorder offer, unprecedented in the history of earthly marketing), why don’t we open a copy to page 15?

At that moment, Irene went by, a glass of champagne in her hand. “Plutocrats, Wendell? Is that nice? Tell him we’re not plutocrats, Bernie.”

“Um, I’m not even actually sure about the exact dictionary – “

“But I’m glad you two have found each other,” Irene went on, or maybe just kept going. “This is the private eye I told you about, Wendell. Who brought home the bacon for us. Bernie Little, say hi to Wendell Nero, chairman emeritus of the geology department at Valley College. And he did end up doing our project, which is why it’s such a success. Wendell’s fierce on the outside but he’s really just a big pussycat.”

Don’t rely on me for the details of what happened next. Because: Bacon! Pussycat! There’d been no bacon whatsoever at any time during our work on the cowboy painting case. You can take that to the bank, although maybe not to our bank, where there’d been some recent issue with Ms. Mendez, the manager. As for pussycat, this white-haired dude did not smell, look, or sound at all like any pussycat on the planet, and I’d had many pussycat experiences in my career, none pleasant. I wrestled in my mind with these problems, bacon and pussycat, getting nowhere. By the time I gave up, Wendell Nero was sitting at our table, and the two glasses of bourbon, his and Bernie’s, seemed to have been topped up.


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This entry was posted on Sunday, June 28th, 2020 at 8:27 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

20 Responses to “Not Beginnings”

  1. B. Stover
    10:46 am on June 28th, 2020

    Chet and metaphors. LOL!

    Good morning all.

  2. B. Stover
    11:19 am on June 28th, 2020

    Happy Birthday Spence.

  3. Chet The Dog
    11:25 am on June 28th, 2020

    Thanks for the birthday wishes, B!

  4. BooBear
    2:51 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Happy Birthday to OFA! Strange year for all of us, but another any kind of year is better than no year! How are you celebrating, Spence?

  5. Wose-The Small and Meek
    3:54 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Many happy returns of the day, Spence! Enjoy!

  6. Hobbit
    4:11 pm on June 28th, 2020

    I am guessing that OFA is celebrating his special day with a few of his favorite activities: family, dogs, biking, playing tennis, writing and arguing with Admin. Maybe all of these in one fun-filled day!

    Best wishes for OFA to achieve all his goals this coming year. (And I hope one of his goals is to visit Alaska and go dog sledding)

  7. dawson
    5:37 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Happy birthday Spence. 😀

  8. Riõ - The Evil Pug
    6:09 pm on June 28th, 2020

    June!…I thought it was in August!…grunt!…Well, Very Happy Birthday Wishes to you Mr Abrahams. Thank you for all the enjoyable reading you have given us over the years. Years! And Years! And Years!…snorkel!

  9. Bluecat
    6:27 pm on June 28th, 2020

    🥳 Happy Birthday to OFA.

  10. Wookie’s and Teddy’s Paw
    8:07 pm on June 28th, 2020

    And a gracious birthday wishes to our OFA from his fans here in Chevy Chase. And thanks to B for keeping track of this important occasion.

  11. Riõ - The Evil Pug
    9:20 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Champagne!…Surely there must be some around, or a big Vat O’ Beer to celebrate the occasion…snort!…Where are those Thieves when one really needs them???…grunt!

  12. Thieves!
    9:38 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Here! Present and accounted for with a birthday vat o’ beer! OFA, as the man of the hour, you get the first dive into the vat o’ beer. Happy birthday, pal!

  13. Riõ - The Evil Pug
    9:51 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Waiting!…I’m waiting…waiting.. I’m still waiting…sniff!..Waiting…waiting.

  14. Thieves!
    9:51 pm on June 28th, 2020

    W&Ts Paw: Hypothetically speaking, if the favorite author of two lovable miscreants landed himself in Mother Jail after celebrating his birthday with the aide of a vat o’ beer, how many Slim Jims would we need to retain your get-out-of-jail-free-card services? We’re asking for a friend.

  15. Riõ - The Evil Pug
    9:53 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Waiting!….I’m still waiting for the special birthday guy to jump into the Vat O Beer…waiting!…sniff!…Still waiting….gugh!

  16. Thieves!
    10:02 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Not to worry, Rio. We brought our spare vat o’ beer. Splash! If Beau asks, it is filled with holy water.

  17. Riõ - The Evil Pug
    10:24 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Bah!…I wanted to see the Birthday Boy go into that Vat O Beer by golly…grunt!

  18. Wookie’s and Teddy’s Paw
    10:35 pm on June 28th, 2020

    Hypothetically responding, tell your friend that the birthday special rate would apply, so a single six-pack of said Slim Jim’s should do it.

  19. Thieves!
    11:02 pm on June 28th, 2020

    W&Ts Paw: Good to know! Now, if we were to push OFA into the vat o’ beer so Rio can dive in, how many Slim Jims would be required?

  20. Staff
    12:27 am on June 29th, 2020

    Happy Birthday Pete.
    (He replied to an email with that name so I feel like I can use it forever now.) 😉

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