In The Swim

The next thing I knew I was in Albie Rose’s swimming pool. And so was Foster! He was really thrashing around, the way some humans do in the water. Personally I love the water. I swam around a bit, watched Foster’s gun sink slowly to the bottom. I could dive down to the bottom and get it, no problem – or not. I swam over to the side of the pool near Bernie to see if he had anything to say about that.

He was standing beside Albie Rose. The umbrella was lying upside down for some reason. “See,” Bernie said, “despite you being a financier – admirable profession, of course – the reason I thought you’d know something about showgirls is that you’ve been married to eight of them. Three named Tiffany, if I remember.”

Foster came sputtering to the surface. “Not the third one,” he said. “Her name was really Ethel. But you kept calling her Tiffany so much she finally changed it legally.”

Albie Rose turned to Foster, eyes narrowing. “How do you know so much about her?”

What was I going on? I wasn’t sure, just knew this was an interview of some kind, and Bernie was a great interviewer. We’d cleared a lot of cases, me and Bernie, but my favorites always included a swim or two.

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 20th, 2010 at 8:56 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

61 Responses to “In The Swim”

  1. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:04 am on April 20th, 2010

    Foster!….Just can’t keep his mouth shut can he? …. Snort!

  2. BStover
    5:37 am on April 20th, 2010

    Absolutely perfect!

  3. Melanie
    5:46 am on April 20th, 2010

    Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. A good job, Chet!

    Nothing like a good swim in the middle of the desert.

    Bernie has everything well in hand. Chet has everything well in teeth and paws.

    Riö, you're right. Foster can not keep his mouth shut.

  4. AbbietheKitty
    6:29 am on April 20th, 2010

    I have been watching this story carefully and I think that Spence may be using the blog as inspiration. Am I the only one who sees a word or a suggestion in the blog is mentioned in the next days post?

    BStover?

    Melanie?

    Spence?

    Of course it could be that we are clairvoyant. We know what Chet is going to do before he does it. But I like to think the first suggestion is correct.

    ~~Staff

  5. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:37 am on April 20th, 2010

    AbbieTheKat!… did someone mention Foster taking a dive into the pool yesterday?… snort! … or is there something else in the post that you are referring to?…. grunt!

  6. Rio - The Evil Pug
    7:24 am on April 20th, 2010

    Sigh!… she’s just like Lil Lexi… snort!… she never answers me… grunt!

  7. BStover
    8:03 am on April 20th, 2010

    Sure, Abbie's staff, and that's part of the fun. Spence uses the blog as a warm-up for whatever project he's working on. It was either Hemingway or Fitzgerald who used to write a letter to his editor, Max Perkins, each morning as a warm-up. I think it's great!

  8. noswad
    8:39 am on April 20th, 2010

    Chet: Good job! I think Foster has been treated so badly by Albie Rose that he's ready to tell you any thing you want to know – he'll spill the beans. Plus sounds like Foster doesn't like the way Albie Rose has treated his women either.

    Wookie: excellent mission control keeping those Newfs and rookies in line. Way to balance work and play.

  9. Tweets that mention Chet The Dog : In The Swim -- Topsy.com
    9:40 am on April 20th, 2010

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by ChetTheDog. ChetTheDog said: In The Swim: The next thing I knew I was in Albie Rose’s swimming pool. And so was Foster! He was really thrashing… http://bit.ly/bWp2IN […]

  10. Siberian Husky
    9:17 am on April 20th, 2010

    Greetings from the North pole everyone!

    Sill searching–We had a feast of seal meat for breakfast in a native village this morning–rich but delicious. Stopped and visited with Santa and had a snack of Christmas coookies. How cool is that! We told him what we wished for Christmas and suggested wings and beer for Rio and a few pounds of ribs for Chet. Santa asked about Chet, and I told him that he would have come with us, but he is on a very interesting and important case.

    We are stopping for a picnic and group discussion later. I'll let you know what we decide at our meeting.

    One thing I do know is that some of us will have to go on a diet when we get home.

  11. Rio - The Evil Pug
    9:30 am on April 20th, 2010

    Diet!… I’ve heard that seal meat has a lot of fat in it…. Heh! … sort of like greasy, grimy, gofer guts… yuck!

  12. Melanie
    9:31 am on April 20th, 2010

    SEAL MEAT!

    I don't care if it is cold up there. With Newfs eating seal meat, keep the windows open.

    I wonder how we'll get the smell out of the van. Not that it started that great anyway.

  13. Sam
    10:27 am on April 20th, 2010

    This seal meat sure beats any of that kibble stuff my family feed me!

  14. Rio - The Evil Pug
    10:55 am on April 20th, 2010

    Sigh!… Poor Bess stuck in that smelly old van…. snort!…. I bet it doesn’t even have a TV in it…. grunt!… I hope those Alpha Bitches aren’t picking on her…. sniff!

  15. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    11:10 am on April 20th, 2010

    Oh oh guys, we have to hurry up and find the towers!

    Rio may be needing our support! Did you hear? Keli McGregor (Presidend of the Rockies) has crossed over to the rainbow bridge. And we know how Rio feels about his team!

    Shall we put it into warp speed and complete our mission?

    Anyone who agrees, Bark yes!

  16. Rio - The Evil Pug
    11:18 am on April 20th, 2010

    Sniff!… Yes, it’s true… snort!… Keli McGregor died on a business trip. But there are no details about how he died… wheeze! … He was a young athletic guy…. snort!… I hope the Rockies win the World Series for him….grunt!

  17. Siberian Husky
    11:40 am on April 20th, 2010

    This is a yes bark, Wofie, even though I don't bark.

    What we decided at our meeting at lunch:

    Stover was right, dang it. There is no tower of chew strips, but the idea of the tower of chew strips lives on in our hearts. It was the journey that was important, the adventures, the friends we made along the way, and all the fun and friendship we had together.

    We are coming home! We miss our families, and Chet's stories. We are looking forward to seeing everyone again.

    Nope, no chew strips, but we are bringing back boxes and boxes of moose jerky for everyone. The gang is lashing the boxes to the top of the van right now. Chet is going to love the moose jerky. Rio, maybe, not so much.

    See you soon!!! Maple promised to write to Wolfie

    Siber-H

  18. B. Stover
    11:42 am on April 20th, 2010

    How old was he (Keli McGregor)?

  19. Siberian Husky
    11:45 am on April 20th, 2010

    He was 48. That is way too young for a human to go to Rainbow Bridge. Wolfie is right–Rio will need the support of all of us. I hope the Rockies win today for him.

  20. Sam
    11:56 am on April 20th, 2010

    I borrowed Wookie's phone to call my family. I know they'll want to have seal meat waiting for me when I get home.

  21. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:00 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Sam!… did Lil Lexi like her seal meat as much as you did?… snort!

  22. Wookie of Chevy Chas
    12:04 pm on April 20th, 2010

    We are all saddened by the death of Keli McGregor, and Rio does need our support in this difficult time. As SiberH said, even though we did not find the tower of chew strips, it was an incredible adventure, one that we will always remember and treasure. This blog has made for some very special friends, and we owe a huge debt of gratitude to Chet, Bernie, Spence and, yes, even Admin, for that. SiberH and I will drive quickly, but with extra care, to get everyone home safely as soon as we can.

    Wookie

    P.S. Melanie, we will be sure to air out the van on the way home, so no need to worry there, although actually it does smell quite interesting, at least to a dog.

  23. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:18 pm on April 20th, 2010

    The Van!… I bet there is smells in that van that would curl Melanie’s toes….snort! … and peal the paint off her garage walls… heh!

  24. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:30 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Peel!….Caught it before Stover said something… whew!

  25. Siberian Husky
    12:38 pm on April 20th, 2010

    We are going to clean out the van before we return it to Melanie. My mother will ground me for a week-no dog park-if I don't return the van clean and smelling good.

    Sam, by the way, enjoyed all the new experiences with an open mind. She will be a world traveler someday.

  26. Môllypôp
    12:42 pm on April 20th, 2010

    I think Lil Lexi's favorite was Santa Claus and the cookies. She even sat on his lap, licked his nose and asked for a lotta lotta stuff!

  27. B. Stover
    12:53 pm on April 20th, 2010

    I'm glad the adventure was "incredible." (No one wants to go into the meaning of that word, right?) We are glad you are coming home. Rio, I hope the Rockies win today. I cheer for them in absentia.

    There is one thing bothering me which I have to mention: Aren't seals endangered?

  28. Rio - The Evil Pug
    1:00 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Gasp!…. That’s a very good question for SiberH!…. grunt!… He was concerned for the Wolves while munching on some poor endangered Seal…. wheeze!

  29. Rio - The Evil Pug
    2:08 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Well!… I wish he would warm up a little longer so we could get more of the story!….grunt!… I know he has trouble typing … snort!… but with a little effort he could tap out a bit more each day!… wheeze!

  30. Môllypôp
    1:18 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Oops!

  31. Wookie of Chevy Chas
    1:21 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Rio and Stover and others concerned. While many species of seals are endangered, not all are. Moreover, there are very humane ways of hunting seals as well as some very inhumane ways. Canada in particular has fairly strict regulations including annual limits on the number of seals that can be hunted. Although canines are carnivores by nature, we were very concerned about all this, but the indigenous natives in the village where we had our breakfast assured us that any seals they hunt are hunted humanely and in strict accordance with their longstanding tribal traditions, and are not on any endangered list. Wookie

  32. B. Stover
    1:26 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Didn't we recently have a discussion about hunting being considered a sport?

  33. Melanie
    1:45 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Hmm. I think that to some of the native cultures in and around the Arctic Circle, there is a thing called subsistence hunting. That's not sport. That's hunting to put food on the table.

    We humans are glad that The Pack is coming back. We've missed them.

    00Wookie and Siber-H, thanks for cleaning the van. We humans appreciate it.

  34. Siberian Husky
    2:42 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Well said about seal hunting Wookie and Melanie. The polar bears are in much more danger than the seals. The bears need the ice to hunt the seals on, and the ice is disappearing fast.

    I don't object to hunting for food as long as all conservation laws are obeyed and the ecosystem stays in balance. I really object to hunting for fashion and trophies.

  35. Siberian Husky
    2:52 pm on April 20th, 2010

    The seals aren't endangered, Rio. The coastal village dogs are fed seal, and the natives have eaten seal since they first arrived in the North. Wolves aren't a part of anyone's diet, and shooting them from an airplane with a high powered rifle is not what I call sporting.

  36. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    3:11 pm on April 20th, 2010

    All I know is that seal jerky is almost as tasty as chicken jerky!!

    Ahhhh….what a fabulous adventure, guys! Thanks for bringing me along!! I will never forget Maple. Next time, we will bring Alice because she looked so sad and lonely in her little box.

    But, Hey, it's good to be back home again!! I loved the photos of my boys, I miss them lots. Like Chet and Bernie, we are a team, and yes, they have kicked quite a few @##@&%. (Which is why they are in a special school. Well, there were other reasons, too many to mention here.)

    Rio, are we going to a have a moment of silence for Rocky, or whatever his name is? I'm glad you're holding up so well.

  37. Siberian Husky
    3:22 pm on April 20th, 2010

    I like the idea of having a moment of silence. Rio is feeling a whole lot better right now because the Rockies are way out ahead-way, way, way out ahead!

    I've been feeling bad about Alice also. Rio is going to have hysterics over us being sorry for Alice. Awww He is watching the game and won't read this.

  38. Rio - The Evil Pug
    3:30 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Well!… Wolfie, its not like I knew the guy personally…. Snort!… I knew of him and I was very grateful for him the way he wanted the Rockies players to be home grown for the most part… grunt!… I’m shocked and I still can’t quite believe it!… wheeze!… but I don’t really know how to grieve his passing when I didn’t personally know him… sigh….I just know my team is kicking butt right now…. 10-zip in the 3rd inning!…. gulp!…if they keep this up, it’s the Series for sure!

  39. Rio - The Evil Pug
    3:31 pm on April 20th, 2010

    SiberH!… get a grip pal!… sigh.

  40. Sam
    3:34 pm on April 20th, 2010

    I felt bad for Alice too, when I saw her in her box all ready to go. We have to take her on our next road trip. She'd be good too – not too long ago we saw a picture of her in the car, coming back from the flood, giving directions to her staff.

  41. Rio - The Evil Pug
    3:40 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Please!… Don’t get me wrong!…cough!… McGregor is the reason the Rockie are what they are today.. sniff!…And he will definitely be missed… snort!… It will be interesting to see what happens in the future with my team… grunt!

    Wow!… Alice in the next mission?…. snort!… I just don’t know if that is possible or not… burp!

  42. Melanie
    3:47 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Just park the van in the driveway guys. And don't forget the truck.

    Tell the Newf Pack to come in on all forty tiptoes . . .

    Dan's asleep and we're going to sleep too.

    I know they've had plenty to eat and some of the moose jerky is coming here, but I have put out some bones for them.

    I finished the Echo Falls series. Wow. Wonderful. DON'T like the Math Teacher; especially in the second book. Ty is as cool as a 9th grade jock can get. Knew that their Dad was up to no good, but he's a great dad at the end. Joey is great; needs to get his brain caught up to the rest of him, and I want his dad to be our C of P.

    Poetic mom . . . Grampy is awesome and above all that Ingrid. I want to be Ingrid when I grow up!

  43. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:15 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Rio

    I don't know Chet personally and I felt HORRIBLE when he had his biopsy.

    Besides, what if the team goes straight down the tubes? Then you would feel bad that you didn't feel bad.

    Melanie,

    I'd like to order the Echo Falls series for Wolfie's boys. Do you think that a couple of former bad boys would enjoy the series? Or should I just order them for myself?

    Dubya

  44. Rio - The Evil Pug
    4:23 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Hmmphf!… Did I say I didn’t feel bad?… snort!… I do not recall that… grunt!… I’ve been thinking about that guy and his family all day, thank you very much… wheeze!… why do I even bother?

  45. Rio - The Evil Pug
    4:25 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Wolfie – Off!

    Alice – Maybe?

  46. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:33 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Sorry, Rio. I feel pretty sad too, and I've never heard of him. He has four young pups, and that just gets me.

    Okay. Back to Chet.

    Here's a random thought. What if Astrid was one of Albie's former wives? Not the three named Tiffany, but one of the others.

    Foster and Albie have an interesting relationship. I wonder how he got hooked up with a guy like Albie.

  47. AbbietheKitty
    4:56 pm on April 20th, 2010

    ~Well I am back, finally. I have been busy all day packing and saying goodbye to friends here in 'the Cities' before our trip tomorrow back to the farm. I didn't even know the dogs had been to the North Pole. Zippy had to tell me at supper time.

    ~Condolences to the Rockies on the loss of their owner.

    ~Rio I would have answered you had I been around. Yes I was talking about pushing Foster in the pool. It was suggested yesterday and happened today.

    ~Tomorrow we will pack up the last of the belongings and try to find Alice. Abbie is always available. Abbie tends to hide with her tail sticking out from underneath things. Alice, however, is a very talented hider. (That spelling looks wrong) Sometimes we just have to sit around for an hour and talk to each other and pretend we aren't going anywhere and then Alice appears and we grab her and leave. We have no idea where she hides. Personally I think she can dematerialize at will. I know she would love to go on an adventure with you doggies however.

    See you Thursday,

    Staff

  48. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:05 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Well!…Alice will have to get her kitty litter together if she wants to go!… snort!… the team can’t wait around for an hour pretending they are not going just so she will appear… cripes!… This just gets more and more complicated… wheeze!

  49. AbbietheKitty
    5:11 pm on April 20th, 2010

    You just let me know where you want me and I will materialize there.

    No problem Rio.

    Alice Johnson

  50. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:11 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Tonight!… we had Huevos Rancheros, scramble eggs with HOT green chili on them… whooo!… I was just recovering from last night…. snort!… but it tasted really good!… grunt!… Cassie, the butt sniffing dog, LOVED HOT green chili!… heh!… she had no problem at all finishing off all the plates… snicker… stomach of iron and bowls of steel!.. heh!

  51. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:12 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Okay, Alice!… (never thought I would write those words…heh)

  52. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:17 pm on April 20th, 2010

    OMG!… Alice and I just posted at the same time… [shudder]

  53. AbbietheKitty
    5:29 pm on April 20th, 2010

    It was bound to happen Rio. Were those bowels of steel? Or did you eat on Steel bowls?

    ~~Alice Johnson (filling in for BStover)

  54. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:46 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Dang!… I’m off on my spelling today!… snort!… That one got right past me… grunt!… Thanks Alice [again, words I thought I would never write…sniff!… Am I in an opposite universe?] … At least Stover didn’t catch it first!… whew!

  55. AbbietheKitty
    6:03 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Goodnight Rio,

    Gotta get rested up for the trip tomorrow.

    Glad everyone made it back safely from the trip.

    ~Staff

  56. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:12 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Hockey!… I’m watching the young Avalanche team go head on with the Sharks!… heh!… There is a Sussex Cricket team named the “The Sharks”, and I have all of their autographs on a miniature cricket bat from the 2003 season…wheeze!… just a tidbit of info.

  57. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:27 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Puss N’ Boots!…[gus and boobear]… I know you are late night Kats!… snort!… Last night when President Taylor believed that Charles Logan over Jack!…wheeze!… I just about died!… grunt!… that Logan is a snake!… he will always be a snake!… grunt!… Poor Jack!… what will he do now??? … And Chloe left with no choice really… arhhhh!…Can’t wait till next weeks episode!!!!…mmmm

  58. Gus & BooBear
    7:40 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Rio, it is really a crisis for Jack. He'll have to figure out how to handle this situation. We have a feeling that Chloe will come through for him. But we don't like President Taylor at all now!!! She sold out so she could get her agenda on course!

    Great job, Chet!! You took care of Foster without hurting him too bad (just his pride). We bet Bernie can get all kinds of information from him.

  59. Rio - The Evil Pug
    7:44 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Me, Myself and I!… The Av's are in over-time with the Sharks!…heh!…Molly how is your team doing??… I haven't checked lately.. snort!… I should go to bed… huff!… but I am not tired at all… gruff!..

    That’s the way I roll… snort!….I go go go go! – then I expire suddenly, some close to me think I die in my bed at that point.. wheeze!… I just don’t want to miss anything sports-wise that interests me, or any other thing that might interest me… grunt!

    Crap!…Reading however is seen as laziness around here and I can’t do that at home, I pushed my limit with The Tutor, Oblivion and Their Wildest Dreams…groan!… Got to sneak in ‘Nerve Damage’ elsewhere!….wheeze…slow going so far, and its got me by the throat now!…ugh!

  60. Rio - The Evil Pug
    7:53 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Hi Gus & BooBear!…I'm glad you guys on this blog are behind Jack as much as I am!…snort!…it's been years and years now for Jack!.. heh! Even before this we loved the actor

    …grunt…Well,thats another story altogether.

  61. Rio - The Evil Pug
    8:16 pm on April 20th, 2010

    Wow!… Actually, the Hockey series here is tied 2-2…snort!.. I guess I am just amazed. Our young ones are still init to winit!…heh!

    Thinking and definitely praying for all of the people having a very hard time in this ole world right now. Earthquakes and Volcanoes are taking a very big toll.

    Good night all!

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