Euphemism + Dysphemism = ?

“We’re looking for a showgirl who came out here twenty years ago or so,” Bernie said.

“Showgirl being a … ” said Albie Rose.

“Euphemism?” said Foster. Foster was Albie Rose’s bodyguard, not the kind of dude you wanted to mess with, except that me and Bernie always wanted to mess with dudes like that. We had this thing in us, me and Bernie, hard to describe.

Albie Rose turned to Foster. “When I need your help I’ll ask for it.”

“Sorry,” said Foster.

“Move my umbrella a little.”

Foster moved Albie Rose’s umbrella.

Albie Rose turned to Bernie. “Showgirl being a euphemism for hooker?” he said.

“Not at first,” said Bernie. “But maybe in the end.”

Albie Rose nodded. “That’s the way it happens,” he said. “You’re a smart guy. How much do you clear on an annual basis?”

“Enough to keep us happy,” Bernie said.

Yes! We were happy! No doubt about it. I was so happy realizing we were happy that I got this sudden urge to give Albie Rose and Foster each a quick little bite.

Note to new Friends: You won’t show up in the rotation at first. Patience, please.

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87 Responses to “Euphemism + Dysphemism = ?”

  1. Melanie
    4:42 am on April 18th, 2010

    OOOHHHHH, so Bernie and Chet must be there about Astrid (especially since the tags has Astrid listed, though she is not mentioned by name in Chet's post).

    Fascinating as Mr. Spock would say. Somehow Astrid went from Tennessee to LV, doing the showgirl stop and maybe falling a bit more.

    Questions: Did CB meet Astrid in Tennessee or in LV before shipping out?

    When she was in LV did she already have Ray?

    Was Ray brought up by those White Lightning relatives?

    And:

    WHERE THE HECK IS THE VAN????

    Also the Pack is now missing.

  2. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    5:04 am on April 18th, 2010

    I am still dizzy after my run in with Alice Johnson's powerful gaze, but SH is right. I am a Dog, and Dogs Rule! Mom and dad just called and they are packing a picnic to take to Dogtown. I wonder if they are packing a lunch for everyone? That would be a lot of sandwiches….2,000 or so, however that many is. I'm not sure, I can only count up to four, which is how many paws I have.

    I too am waiting for the van to show up! I am ready! I brought a bag of Chicken jerky to tide us over until we find all the towers!

    Melanie – I hope the Pack didn't leave without you!!!

    Rio, thanks for letting me come! I can't wait to meet all of you in person!! Yippee!!!!

    Wolfie the Rookie

  3. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    5:09 am on April 18th, 2010

    Melanie,

    I think that Bob and Astrid met in Tennesse. Maybe she came to Vegas to earn enough money to support Ray.

    Maybe Astrid is in trouble.

    Somehow I get the feeling that she is no longer alive.

    I wonder what she told Ray about his dad?

    I hope the van gets here before I eat all the Chicken jerky treats! They are irrestible!

  4. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    5:14 am on April 18th, 2010

    I mean, they are yummy! I am a dog, and I am not good at spelling big words.

  5. B. Stover
    5:24 am on April 18th, 2010

    I wonder where the pack is. Wolfie, you are funny.

    Euphemism + dysphemism = miscommunication.

  6. Melanie
    5:31 am on April 18th, 2010

    Wolfie Dog, I can't make it today. So I believe Siber-H and 00Wookie are driving the van. At least I hope they are.

    They said they could drive. Mac can drive as he is the Alpha male of the Pack. But unless Mattie (she's our tracker) is up front with him . . . he does tend to get distracted. Maybe they are meeting up with everyone somewhere. I hope they didn't just get excited and leave with out intel.

    Back to Astrid, Ray and Bob. I hope Astrid isn't dead. She sounds like she's quite a character. What could she have said about a one night stand? Maybe it was those relatives. They sort of scare me.

  7. inej
    5:48 am on April 18th, 2010

    Chet: You remind me to be happy. If I had a tail I'd wag it.

    Albie Rose sure treats Foster bad. That can't make him happy.

    Lots happening on this blog the last week. Birthdays are usually happy. Hospitals and emergency operations – not so much.

    Melanie: Healing thoughts for your Dad and hope your Mom's ankle is better.

    I'm going for a bike ride around the lake. There'll be lots of dogs to admire – that makes me happy.

  8. AbbietheKitty
    5:49 am on April 18th, 2010

    OK I was quite wrong about this being a snippit from an earlier book. This is a blog book for us. YAY!!

    ~~Astrid and Col Bob met before he shipped out. He never saw her again, that much was told us up front when CB admitted to Bernie about having a son.

    She had to have had Ray, or at least been pregnant, before she left Tennessee or he wouldn't be Col. Bob's son.

    That probably was the reason she left Tennessee.

    I don't think the White Lightning relatives would have kept the son even if Astrid would have left him. I suspect she was turned out from her home for being less than perfect. It happens a lot and happened a lot more back then.

    I am glad Chet is paying attention.

    ~Staff,

    PS, Alice and Abbie are excited to see their pictures up as friends of Chet!!!

    So Ray was born or was young in Las Vegas, and could have met Albie Rose there.

  9. AbbietheKitty
    5:54 am on April 18th, 2010

    Hehehe,

    I just learned that Zippy posted at the same time as me but is being moderated because she used a different name.

    She was going to use Dawson spelled backwards but thought that Rio would make fun of Noswad! As Rio would most certainly have done.

    AbbietheKitty

  10. AbbietheKitty
    5:55 am on April 18th, 2010

    Well that was a short moderation.

    I have had much longer ones than that!

    Alice Johnson

  11. B. Stover
    5:56 am on April 18th, 2010

    When Ray spoke to Col. Bob he was probably extremely upset because something has happened to his mother. He has seen how hard her life has been and blames his absent father. Perhaps she told Ray to find Col. Bob when she realized something was going to happen. It seems to me that Chet and Bernie are talking to Albie to get info, not because of any connection between Ray and Albie. I may be wrong however.

  12. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:27 am on April 18th, 2010

    Hmmmm…. Very interesting!…snort!… If “showgirl” is the Euphemism, and “hooker” is the Dysphemism… grunt!….then whatever Astrid became is somewhere in between the two…. wheeze!

    Loved! … the part where Albie shoots down Foster showing off his language skills!…cough!… and says, “When I need your help I will ask for it.”….snicker!… and then he says, “Move my umbrella a little.”…. heh!

  13. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:35 am on April 18th, 2010

    AbbieTheKat!… I still do not see Noswad’s post… snort!… where did she go I wonder?…snort!

  14. AbbietheKitty
    6:40 am on April 18th, 2010

    Yes, BStover, we have no proof that Ray and Albie know each other. Just that Astrid went to LV. I hope that Ray and Albie don't know each other. That would not be good for Ray in my humble opinion. I can't wait to find out how Col Bob learned about Astrid from Ray. They haven't talked to each other yet. Then Col. Bob talked to Bernie.

    When did the trip to the Caribbean come into it? Remember that? Or was that just part of TFAT?

    ~Staff

  15. AbbietheKitty
    6:42 am on April 18th, 2010

    Oh Wolfie, honey buns,

    I just love your wiggley little butt to pieces. I don't care if you are a doggie. Makes it more interesting to me.

    [img ]http://www.chetthedog.com/wp-content/uploads/1271605328-small alice.jpg[/img]

    Or, as I say to Staff…OBEY ME EARTHLING!!!

  16. Gus & BooBear
    6:42 am on April 18th, 2010

    The plot thickens, as they say. Stay awake, Chet!! We definitly need more details. Maybe WolfieW would share some chicken jerkey with you to keep you alert (if he hasn't eaten it all waiting for the NewfPack to arrive)

  17. AbbietheKitty
    6:44 am on April 18th, 2010

    Rio, do you have a post of INEJ? She wouldn't post as Noswad…

    Tee hee.

    AbbietheKitty

  18. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:46 am on April 18th, 2010

    Hopefully!… Everybody has their special glasses on…snicker!… Uh-oh… did anyone give Wolfie his special glasses??….snort!… Molly or Sam please put in an urgent order for glasses. Get a few extra just in case this groups keeps growing….grunt!

  19. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:49 am on April 18th, 2010

    Well!… how the hell am I supposed to know INEZ is Noswad is Zippy is Dawson??… grump!… puts me in a really bad mood… snarl!

  20. AbbietheKitty
    7:11 am on April 18th, 2010

    gosh Rio! I didn't mean to put you in a bad mood. After all the hints (direct words) I gave you about Zippy. It is not like Alice teasing you about those Rockettes or anything.

    Sheesh!

    AbbietheKitty

  21. Rio - The Evil Pug
    7:29 am on April 18th, 2010

    Rockettes!…. gasp!… How very annoying of you… grunt!… You’re just lucky I have so much to do today…. growl!

  22. B. Stover
    7:32 am on April 18th, 2010

    I don't believe that glasses will protect any of you from the awesome power of beautiful Alice Johnson.

  23. B. Stover
    7:41 am on April 18th, 2010

    Abbie's staff: Here's the blog of Jan. 6 titled "Back in the Valley." I think Col. Bob flew them to the Caribbean and back and that this is the first time we hear about his son:

    Colonel Bob came down to St. Lucia and flew us back home. Have I mentioned Colonel Bob? He might be in Thereby Hangs A Tail. He and Bernie go way back. They talked a lot, something about Colonel Bob’s son. There’s some problem, but don’t ask me what.

    Bernie read for a while on the plane. He’s got this new book, Pops, all about Louis Armstrong. He says it’s a real good book, but kind of sad. That gave me the idea of maybe giving it a little chew, but I never got the chance.

    St. Lucia was great but it’s great to be home, too. Right now I have to go sniff around the whole property.

  24. Lexi
    7:49 am on April 18th, 2010

    WOW. Those are BIG words. They're all a blur to me…

    What do they mean? Chet, do you know?

  25. Melanie
    8:16 am on April 18th, 2010

    B.Stover: I knew the first, had to look up the second.

    Riö: you are much more "with it" today than I!

    Still no sign of The Pack. I'm getting concerned.

    BUT: Thanks all for the good thoughts and crossed paws! Dan is coming home today!

  26. Tweets that mention Chet The Dog : Euphemism + Dysphemism = ? -- Topsy.com
    9:23 am on April 18th, 2010

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by ChetTheDog. ChetTheDog said: Euphemism + Dysphemism = ?: “We’re looking for a showgirl who came out here twenty years ago or so,” Bernie said. … http://bit.ly/8ZxCEN […]

  27. Môllypôp
    8:32 am on April 18th, 2010

    Rio – How can I order more special polarized gradient CIA-quality anti-Alice glasses? You canceled the credit card.

  28. Siberian Husky
    8:47 am on April 18th, 2010

    The pack is with me, Melanie, and they are all doing fine. I promised them I would stop somewhere so they could have a nice swim. Our goal is to have fun on this trip. Since I took the van, I left my mom's truck for you at your house.

    I'm glad Dan is coming home today. I know he will be glad to get home. I should have left Rio there with you so you would have some canine company while the pack is away. We are going to camp out, and I don't think Rio will enjoy the great outdoors.

  29. Siberian Husky
    9:00 am on April 18th, 2010

    After picking everyone up in the Northeast, I'm on my way to pick you up Wolfie. I may be slightly delayed, though, because I might still turn around and take Rio back to Melanie's. Rio has been hollering some nonsense about being dognapped.

  30. Lexi
    9:27 am on April 18th, 2010

    Melanie! I'm glad that your daddy is coming home today and proud of you that you stuck through the hard times without cracking. Great job!

    Siber-H! I'm ready to go! I can't wait! And I'm also dying to go to the park, so, can we stop by before we leave? Please?

  31. Siberian Husky
    9:28 am on April 18th, 2010

    It is nice to have all your comments to read after I read Chet's story . It helps me remember. It is really extra hard to remember while doing all this cross-country driving. Wookie and Mac are a big help. Since we take turns driving, we can all get our naps.

  32. Siberian Husky
    9:49 am on April 18th, 2010

    Sure, we can stop by the park Lexi. I hope it is a dog park. I love dog parks. There is one small problem–what part of the country do you live in?

  33. Rio - The Evil Pug
    10:16 am on April 18th, 2010

    Quacky! Wacky …That’s what you guys are!…snort!… I’m not in the van, don’t let Siber-H pull the goggles over your eyes…grunt!… No one makes me go where I don’t want to… cough!… Does Wookie have his swamp vest space suit on? … snicker!…

    Lil Lexi!… I think she lives in MA….snort!… close to you-know-who!… heh!

    Molly!… I will order the special glasses!… snort!… Just keep those other guys in line and DON”T GET CAUGHT!…. sigh.

  34. Rio - The Evil Pug
    10:25 am on April 18th, 2010

    Yeesh!… all that running around we had to do this morning!… Grump!… Now I’ve missed the first 5 innings of the game …. Blast it!

  35. Rio - The Evil Pug
    11:41 am on April 18th, 2010

    Updates!… Are you guys there yet?… snort!… Did you get a permission slip to take Lil Lexi with you?…. grunt….SiberH!… you are missing a close game this afternoon!… heh!

  36. Melanie
    11:53 am on April 18th, 2010

    Siber-H, I was wondering who's truck that was.

    Gracie has been texting but it looks like this.

    (*&%%^*()

    Hope you're having fun.

  37. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:00 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Heh!… That Gracie!…heh!… Gracie! What’s Bess up to???… snort!… I’m sort of worried about all those guys….sniff!… I hope they bring the van back in one piece….grunt!… We may need it again someday….sneeze!… At least I know Wookie is with them and he knows how to take care of everything….sigh.

    sob!…Rockies lost. It was a white knuckle heart breaker!…. sob!

  38. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:26 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Hmmm!…. I wonder if they even know where Goldman Sachs lives?… snort!… I’m not sure this was a well planned out trip… grunt!… My eyes are watering…. sneeze!… someone is making their hot green chili and its like a Pot O’ Fire simmering over there….cough!

  39. Sam
    12:36 pm on April 18th, 2010

    I just saw a van full of dogs go by, thinking it was coming to pick me up, but it wasn't our guys. These guys were German Shepherds and a Dalmation was driving.

    Oh no! Do you think they found out about the tower of chew strips and are trying to get to it first?

  40. Rio - The Evil Pug
    12:50 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Sam!… oh my, that would be something if our guys got into a rumble with the Dalmatian and the German Shepard’s over those made up chew strips… wow!… I’m glued to the screen!… gulp!… I know Wookie has his taser with him at all times… sniff!… I hope he doesn’t have to use it…. Grunt!.. This fun trip could get ugly!

  41. AbbietheKitty
    12:51 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Goodness Gracious, Alice has been howling today. At first I thought it was because she dropped a 'treat' off the stairway landing and had to go get it, but now I think it is because the dogs have gotten away and she no longer has control.

    Alice Johnson lives to be in control.

    Maybe you guys could come by here and pick her up and pretend she is in charge. She wouldn't have to really be in charge. All you would have to do is say "Yes, Alice" occasionally and she would be happy.

    Probably.

    ~Staff

  42. AbbietheKitty
    12:52 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Hey Rio,

    Twins lost too. Lots of chances and many men left on base. Drat it all. Tomorrow is another day. :-)

    ~Staff

  43. Rio - The Evil Pug
    1:20 pm on April 18th, 2010

    AbbieTheKat!… yup! Tomorrow is another day for sure… snort!… I’m glad the Twins lost though, they were getting to big for their britches…. Heh!

    Alice!… wouldn’t last one minute in a van full of Newfs who eat kats for breakfast!…heh!

  44. Siberian Husky
    1:27 pm on April 18th, 2010

    We are having a blast!! Listening to those good old road songs like "Convoy" and "Six days on the Road". Nothing like a road trip in the spring. We are not worried about German Shepherds and Dalmations. We are way ahead of them and where we are going, they wouldn't dare to follow.

    Wish we had some of that green chili to take with us.

    We are not picking up Alice.

    Soon, I will turning this van due North. Mattie is reading the map during the daylight hours. At night, the north star will guide us. No GPS in the van.

  45. Melanie
    1:44 pm on April 18th, 2010

    The Pack does NOT like kats for breakfast . . . just for snacks.

    Really, the neighbor's cat comes over and they feed him jerky bits. They are very nice. BUT, if you guys get in drag race with that other van . . . you'll fry the engine!

  46. Rio - The Evil Pug
    2:16 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Gee!… How many days are these guys going to be gone?…. snort!… This could eventually get really interesting….grunt!… We need others to step up and narrate the trip for us…sniff!… Siber-H can’t be expected to do it all! … wheeze! … What’s going on out there on the open road?

    Bess!… How is my babe doing?… snort!… I hope she has enough food and entertainment… grunt! … is Lil Lexi on the van now?…. What’s Wookie wearing?,,,, heh!

  47. Sam
    2:27 pm on April 18th, 2010

    They just picked up Mollypop and me. On the road again … Well, Molly again; this is my first road trip. Woo hoo!

    The Newfs are singing 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.

  48. Melanie
    2:47 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Bess has taken the cell phone from Gracie and has managed to send the following message:

    All windows are down. Smells are great. Passed big river. Headed north. Howling songs. Great fun, lots of wagging tails.

  49. Melanie
    2:48 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Huh, I'm waiting moderation because I put the new email address down. Whoops.

  50. Siberian Husky
    3:10 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Bess is doing fine, Rio. She says to tell you that she misses you, and that she is sorry that you bailed out of the van way back there in Dodge.

    Wookie doesn't need his cooling wrap because with every mile we put behind us, the temperature is dropping. Lexi is with us. Wolfie is with us. He had to leave before his family got back from Dog Town, so he left them a note.

  51. Siberian Husky
    3:22 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Yeah, Rio You were suppose to be the one telling this story. I just volunteered to drive.

    I know about the Rockies game today because we stopped at a Barnes and Noble with WI-FI. Molly has her laptop with her.

  52. Sam
    3:33 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Melanie – help!! – the Newfs won't stop singing 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall. They don't know numbers so how can this song ever end? What can we do?

    Molly's on the laptop playing Peggle. I want her to give me a turn. Whine whine.

  53. Melanie
    3:38 pm on April 18th, 2010

    I have three posts up . . . I'm being moderated because we changed our email!

    Hopefully they will come up soon!

  54. Melanie
    3:40 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Weird. I changed back to the old email to post and my moderated posts disappeared. This is with the new email. I wonder what will happen now?

    Well, got to check on Dad. I sure hope the whole mission Van Pack are having a great time.

  55. Sam
    3:54 pm on April 18th, 2010

    I'm calling for help and admin is sleeping. Oh fine. I'll see if maybe we can all sing Row, Row, Row Your Boat.

    I'm trying to have Siber-H not be distracted with his driving, which is very good, by the way.

    We're ahead of those other guys!

  56. Gus and BooBear
    4:04 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Have fun, guys but be careful. A van full of german shepherds could be gang related and very dangerous. Best steer clear of that trouble !

  57. AbbietheKitty
    4:09 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Gosh I don't know if Alice would have wanted a trip in a van of singing Newfoundlers, even if they would say "Yes Alice" to her. I think it is a good thing she was not picked up.

    She doesn't know that though. She is feeling sad and neglected. Poor little Alice Johnson.

    [img ]http://www.chetthedog.com/wp-content/uploads/1271639288-smalice box.jpg[/img]

    She was all packed and ready to go!

    ~Staff

  58. Sam
    4:12 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Wookie is singing great harmony here. Who knew? And through all this, Lexi and Wolfie are napping. I can't believe it!

  59. Siberian Husky
    4:16 pm on April 18th, 2010

    I'm feeling bad now. We will take Alice next time. She won't bother me. I will just ignore her, but I can't promise that some of the other dogs won't get freaked out by her being with us.

  60. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:17 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Wolfie reporting in! This is a fun, fun, fun trip! I "borrowed" my mom's slush fund so we have lots to eat! Whoo-wee, you should have seen the expressions McDonalds when we ordered 160 hamburgers without the buns. And that was just for the newfies!

    We like singing row row row because we don't have to count! We sang (okay, so maybe it was more like a howl) in a three part round and we sounded like angels. I'm sure of it.

    Good thing we are driving around the clock so we won't have to stop at a hotel. None of us thought to bring our dog beds with us and besides, I don't think anyone in their right mind would rent a room to all of us. Even Motel 6.

    Sam – can we sing the Mollypop song now? That is my favorite!

    Melanie, the pack is the greatest! (I will politely not mention the gas from all the Mickeydees.) Lexi, you are a doll. So is Bess! Wookie, you are a stud! And a good driver too! We end up on the right side of the highway sometimes.

    Uh….I think I see a red and blue flashing light following us. Does anyone know what means?

  61. Môllypôp
    4:19 pm on April 18th, 2010

    I've got Mapquest on the computer and we're right on track. Siber-H is better than the Dalmation at driving so we're gaining on them.

    I have to get back to my computer game – Bejeweled this time.

    I can't wait for those chew strips.

  62. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:20 pm on April 18th, 2010

    If we take Alice, then she can use her magic gaze on the nice black and white car that has been following us……

    but not on me. it took me too long to remember how to find the capital letters and – oh, it is happening again. alice johnson has some powerful magic……ooooooooo

  63. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:22 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Rio – we miss you!

    Daggum it, you are the Commander!

  64. Sam
    4:38 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Melanie has three posts that admin is sleeping on. We need some help here!

  65. wookie of chevy chas
    4:42 pm on April 18th, 2010

    fortunately, I grabbed my dad's Blackberry before I left (he doesn't need it anyway). It's night now, but we are relentless and will not falter. Doing a little celestial navigation to supplement the Mapquest. The Newfs are snoring in harmony now. Once we are close we should be able to dead reckon by the smell of the chew strips. We will not be denied. Wookie

  66. Siberian Husky
    4:51 pm on April 18th, 2010

    A note from Siber-H's mom:

    Have you guys figured out yet where Siber-H and the gang are headed?

    He thinks the tower of chew strips and the Big Rock Candy Mountain are somewhere above the Arctic circle. A husky thinks in terms of tundra not tropics.

    He has watched every episode of Ice Road Truckers on tv so he knows he can drive on past Fairbanks, pick up the Dalton highway, and drive all the way to the Arctic Ocean.

    Sorry, In the future, I will pay more attention to what he is watching on tv.

    The gang is safe with him. He is reliable in his own independent way. I do wish Rio were with them, though.

    He has my credit card.

  67. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:02 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Heh!Heh!… You guys are doing just fine without me!…Hell, way better than expected! wheeze!… I am a bit worried about the patrol car behind you….Snort!… Do you think Siber-H can lose them?….hmmm….I know Wookie could, he has his “00-W” driving cerification….grunt!

    Alice!… HA! Now that is funny!… snort!… All packed and nobody came to get her!…HA…. What a riot!… grunt!… I have a bad rhyme for Alice!… heh!

    Alice Johnson sitting in a box

    No one coming so take off your socks

    Unpack the box, here’s one on the rocks

    We’ll drink a toast and make the most

    A trip we missed but we can still get pissed.

    [Pissed is English slang for drunk]

    oh!… Lord!… I just read Siber-Moms post!…. snort!… they are on their way to the Artic Circle… heh!… I hope the van has anti-freeze….gulp!… and Molly doesn’t get her paws on the credit card!.. yikes!

    Bess!… misses me?…mmmm… cough!

  68. Môllypôp
    5:05 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Siber-H's Mom – I am Molly's Mom and I know all about the Big Rock Candy Mountain. (Pogo lives) That's all I could think about as this poodlehead kept wanting to go for the Tower of Chew Strips.

    Your credit card is in danger with Molly and now Sam too.

  69. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:32 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Hmmm!… Maybe the “Moms” need to unite and bring these wayward children home!…snort!… before something goes terribly wrong!… grunt!… Or even worse!….snicker!… Molly and Sam get a hold of that credit card and wipe out the Siber-H family fortune… gulp!

    Wha!?… is this Big Rock Candy Mountain anyway???…snort!

  70. Siberian Husky
    5:43 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Not to worry. We gave the van a complete check up in Dawson City, and bought it new tires. Malanie will get the van returned in good shape.

    The ice has already broken up on the Yukon, so spring is arriving in the north country. Fairbanks here we come!

    Wookie is driving, but we are not speeding so the patrol car has nothing on us. It would be impossible to speed on these roads.

    Tell mom that I won't let the girls near her credit card.

  71. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:53 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Moms!… Siber-H has it all under control so far!… snort!… What a trip!…I hope someone took a camera!… grunt!

  72. Môllypôp
    5:55 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Rio – Molly's Mom here – You are too young to know about the Big Rock Candy Mountain. It's a wonderful and unfortunately very similar story. It goes back to Pogo Possum time (I have met the enemy and he is us).

    Siber-H's Mom – I have so many dog toys, you wouldn't believe it.

  73. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    6:20 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Heck, I always wanted to go the Artic Circle, what's a little detour anyway! I guess those flashing lights were for the dal-shepard team. I have a feeling they were picked up by the spca!

    Onward and upward, team!

    Siber's mom,

    Don't worry. We buy the chicken jerky treats at Costco and they aren't all that expensive!

  74. Siberian Husky
    6:24 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Don't worry, Molly's mom. We will soon be in wild country where there are no dog toys to purchase. Molly will be "roughing it", which will be good for her. She will do just fine. If that team of poodles can finish the Iditarod, Molly can do without dog toys for awhile. I left my stuffed animals behind-no room in the van.

    I'm going to sleep now. I'll take the early driving shift. I hope the sky is clear in the morning, so we can see Denali and the Alaska range.

  75. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:49 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Sigh… I may have made a huge mistake not going on this trip! …Except, I’m not so good at being “away” from my stuff… sniff! …. I probably would have made everyone miserable… sniff!… its all for the best this way!

    Gasp!… I had no idea there was a Rock Candy Mountain plan from long ago!…snort!… Whatever that is!.. golly! … I still do not know! …grunt!… How amazing is this story or what? … cough!cough… to be continued maybe?… I hope so!… I have to go to bed now.

    Drive safe and camp in a secured area you guys! … snort!… Good night!

  76. Wookie of Chevy Chas
    6:53 pm on April 18th, 2010

    On the road again –

    Just can't wait to get on the road again.

    The life I love is making music with my friends

    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    On the road again

    Goin' places that I've never been.

    Seein' things that I may never see again

    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    On the road again –

    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway

    We're the best of friends.

    Insisting that the world keep turning our way

    And our way

    is on the road again.

    Just can't wait to get on the road again.

    The life I love is makin' music with my friends

    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    On the road again

    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway

    We're the best of friends

    Insisting that the world keep turning our way

    And our way

    is on the road again.

    Just can't wait to get on the road again.

    The life I love is makin' music with my friends

    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    Wookie

  77. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    7:02 pm on April 18th, 2010

    WOW!!! I just saw the northern lights.

    Bee-you-ti-ful!!

    I'm going to stay awake just in case I see Santa at the North Pole. He forgot to bring me all ten cases of CJ strips for xmas and I need to have a word with him.

    (sung softly, so as not to wake up the sleeping beauties.)

    Dah da da da da

    I just can't wait to get back on the road again

    da da……da da…

  78. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    7:30 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Yawn. I'm just about ready to doze off under the artic sky when I remembered that I remembered something! You know the feeling?

    Astrid came to Las Vegas approx 20 years ago. Ray Jason is 25. So it looks as if Ray was just about ready to start school when he and his mom moved to LV.

    Bigger yawn. I just rememebered that it's been a long day and it's time to sink down into a slumbering mass of doggies. It seems to be about a 15 dog night.

    ZZZZzzzzzzz from WWWWWwwwwww

  79. Melanie
    8:37 pm on April 18th, 2010

    Sam, I’m still being moderated!!!!!!

    If they stop singing, they’re just going to say “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?”

  80. Wookie of Chevy Chas
    4:07 am on April 19th, 2010

    Good morning everyone in the van. Time to rise and shine and for our early morning stretchies. SiberH and I have made great time and I think we are getting close. Fortuantely, we lost the dalmations and German shephers outside of Fairbanks: I think the patrol car nailed them. Just need to figure out what to do for breakfast until we find those chew strips. I just hope there is no limit on the credit card. Rather devilish of that Goldman Sachs perp to hide them all the way up there. But we are ready to go. The adventure continues . . . .

    Wookie

  81. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:27 am on April 19th, 2010

    I call shotgun!!

  82. AbbietheKitty
    4:39 am on April 19th, 2010

    Goldman probably wanted to store them in a place where they wouldn't spoil. I have heard it is cold up in the Arctic Circle. But what about the Polar Bears? Don't they like chew strips too?

    Be careful guys.

    AbbietheKitty

  83. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:44 am on April 19th, 2010

    Wooks,

    After we find the towers, I say we go bite the sacks perps in the shins! (Although if they are stealing all this money, why are they wearing sacks? Or maybe they are playing in a big band somewhere with their saxes?) I dunno. But Huffington post says hat they gave themselves $5 billion dollars in bonuses. I think that that is more than 4.

    Can we stop for breakfast soon? Wolfie wb is a hungry boy!

  84. Wolfie Wigglebutt
    4:48 am on April 19th, 2010

    Polar bears??

    Gulp!

    Nevermind aout the shotgun thing. I think I'll hang out at teh bottom of the dogpile.

    Later, dudes.

  85. Amy
    7:26 pm on April 22nd, 2010

    On the road again –
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is making music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again
    Goin' places that I've never been.
    Seein' things that I may never see again
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again –
    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway
    We're the best of friends.
    Insisting that the world keep turning our way
    And our way
    is on the road again.
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is makin' music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again
    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway
    We're the best of friends
    Insisting that the world keep turning our way
    And our way
    is on the road again.
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is makin' music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    Wookie

  86. Patrick
    5:00 pm on April 24th, 2010

    On the road again –
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is making music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again
    Goin' places that I've never been.
    Seein' things that I may never see again
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again –
    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway
    We're the best of friends.
    Insisting that the world keep turning our way
    And our way
    is on the road again.
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is makin' music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    On the road again
    Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway
    We're the best of friends
    Insisting that the world keep turning our way
    And our way
    is on the road again.
    Just can't wait to get on the road again.
    The life I love is makin' music with my friends
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.
    And I can't wait to get on the road again.

    Wookie

  87. Dave
    6:50 am on April 25th, 2010

    Wooks,
    After we find the towers, I say we go bite the sacks perps in the shins! (Although if they are stealing all this money, why are they wearing sacks? Or maybe they are playing in a big band somewhere with their saxes?) I dunno. But Huffington post says hat they gave themselves $5 billion dollars in bonuses. I think that that is more than 4.

    Can we stop for breakfast soon? Wolfie wb is a hungry boy!

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