Chetspeak on Sunday

“I think my boyfriend is cheating on me.”

We should have walked away at that very moment, me and Bernie, or better yet run, our tails between our legs. Not so easy in Bernie’s case, since, maybe like you, he’s stuck with living a tailless life, poor guy. Imagine that! Actually, I can’t. The good news is that I’ve got enough tail for two, a strong, bushy, pleasing-to-the-eye tail that even has a mind of its own. Sometimes it wags me! Or just about. I’m not so easy to wag, being a hundred-plus pounder, and strong for my size, Bernie says. And not just Bernie: ask some of the perps up at Northern State Correctional, although they may not have time for chitchat, what with being so busy breaking rocks in the hot sun. The point is we’ve taken down lots of perps here at the Little Detective Agency. Bernie’s last name is Little. I’m Chet, pure and simple.

This customer with the cheating boyfriend problem did not look like a perp. What she looked like was the kind of woman who has a certain affect on Bernie. A lock of her golden hair – mostly golden, that is, the roots telling a darker story – drooped down over one eye and she flicked it back into place with a little shake of the head. That got Bernie’s attention, big time. Why? I just didn’t understand.

– from TAIL OF VENGEANCE (the 3rd C&B e-short).


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This entry was posted on Sunday, February 12th, 2017 at 8:10 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

45 Responses to “Chetspeak on Sunday”

  1. Wose-the small and meek
    8:20 am on February 12th, 2017


    Happy Egg Day!

    “Tail of Vengeance”…I love that e-short! Every time I read the phrase “breaking rocks in the hot sun” I laugh out loud!

    Good day to all!

  2. Herd of Hounds
    8:30 am on February 12th, 2017

    Good morning Wose and everyone! We bet Wose is singing about breaking rocks in the hot sun this morning. We love this Chetspeak ???? Happy egg day to everyone. Ours were scrambled with chunks of hot dog mixed in…relish.
    Rest up and enjoy your Sunday. Poor workers go back to the rat race tomorrow.
    Never saw one of those.
    Sunny, enjoyable Sunday to all!

  3. Herd of Hounds
    8:32 am on February 12th, 2017

    NO! No relish, delish!

  4. dawson
    8:50 am on February 12th, 2017

    Chetspeak and eggs with hot dog pieces! An excellent way to start the day.

  5. B.Stover
    9:04 am on February 12th, 2017

    Good morning Chet and all.

  6. Wose-the small and meek
    9:45 am on February 12th, 2017

    HOH: Breaking rocks in the hot sun and chain gangs…


  7. Herd of Hounds
    9:49 am on February 12th, 2017

    Burp! Oops, exsqueeze us. Dawson, next time such a delish dish is planned, we’ll
    invite you.

  8. Herd of Hounds
    9:57 am on February 12th, 2017

    Oh Wose, you got us on that one. We thought you would say, I Fought the Law and the Law Won ⛏

  9. BMALS
    10:03 am on February 12th, 2017

    No eggs here this morning. It was a toasted bagel, cream cheese, capers, red onion and toped with smoked salmon. Yum!

    Bee, Did you see the grammar question I asked you yesterday. Anyone else have an opinion on it?

    I am heading down to spend a few hours with Lily and Ben. Sitter is gone, Baye is at work, and Kelly and Chad will not be back until tonight.

    Wose, The lunch at school with Lyla and Jack was fun. A little wild and crazy in the grade school lunch room, but fun. I don’t remember kids being allowed to be that out of control when I was in school. Lots of running, yelling and wrestling. Is that the norm these days? I bet Martha would know.

  10. Wose-the small and meek
    10:32 am on February 12th, 2017

    HOH: Heh! Good song choice!

    BMALS: Glad that you had a good time! When I was in grammar school, there were no problems in the lunch room. Everyone pretty much just wanted to eat lunch and socialize. Recess was pretty tame as well…just kids playing games and having fun.

  11. BMALS
    10:41 am on February 12th, 2017

    Yes Rose, I remember talking and having fun. Just not the running and yelling that was going on. Didn’t see a single teacher or monitor tell anyone to correct behavior.

  12. Masquers
    10:53 am on February 12th, 2017

    The Hobbit comes to visit!
    First lunch in La Conner.

  13. B.Stover
    10:54 am on February 12th, 2017

    Barb: Sorry, I did not see your grammar question yesterday. You are correct: The author should have used “older.”

  14. Masquers
    10:56 am on February 12th, 2017

    Then a leisurely stroll along the boardwalk.

  15. Herd of Hounds
    11:01 am on February 12th, 2017

    Masquers, thanks for the fotos. It looks like a good time was had.

  16. Staff
    1:27 pm on February 12th, 2017

    It also looks like it was COLD.

    Good morning all.

  17. Herd of Hounds
    2:02 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Staff, how are the thumbs holding up?

  18. Masquers
    2:02 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Actually, not too cold but very WINDY.

  19. Wose-the small and meek
    2:18 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Masquers: Thanks for the photos! I hope someday Grizz and I can visit with youse!

  20. Rio - The Evil Pug
    3:06 pm on February 12th, 2017

    BACK!…snort!…And it looks like for good this damned time…sneeze!…My friend realized most of the problems that started happening after she got the laptop back from the shop were because of a large Windows 10 update happening in the background which made it impossible to use the computer for anything else….grump!…It would be nice if they put up a message saying what is going on…wheeze!…Anyway after we got home from that dreadfully loud and obnoxious library she decided to just let the darned thing run and eventually around 9:30 last night the updates completed. But they started again once I turned the computer on today….grumble!…Alas, they did not take too much longer to finish this time….So Therefore, I’M BACK!….snort!

  21. Herd of Hounds
    3:09 pm on February 12th, 2017

    But Wose, y’all would have to fly to the Pacific Northwest to do that. And that might mean through Chicago and your favorite motel.

  22. Macy the dainty min pin
    3:25 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Welcome back, pugface!

    We never get eggs, sniff. Mom just threw out a carton from Thanksgiving that she could have made for us, but noooo. We all did get to go on a one dog at a time Walkie though, but boy was it windy. My short sassy hairdo held up just fine, mom’s, not so much. It is supposed to be rainy for the next couple of days so I had to get out while I could.

  23. Teddy Ruff Rider
    4:08 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Rio. Now that you are back, can you give us your thoughts on the quilt. We missed you last weekend and would really like to hear them. As they say, inquiring minds want to know…

  24. BearSpiritDog
    4:29 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Rio! So Happy Youse are back!

  25. Staff
    4:35 pm on February 12th, 2017

    BMALS, The thumb seems better sometimes. Other times it is still clicky but it is early days yet. It takes a while. Last night I could bend it without any clicks. Today, not so much.

    Welcome back.

    I suppose your tech person did a restore to an earlier date and it was before that terribly long update windows did last year. Glad that is over.

  26. Wose-the small and meek
    4:35 pm on February 12th, 2017

    RIO! You are back!! That Windows 10 is a real pain in the $%#!!! The very same thing happened to Grizz.

    HOH: Ah, the Ashtray Motel…

  27. Herd of Hounds
    4:48 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Wose, the DDD just wandered through the room muttering bad things about the Apple 10 is update.

  28. Wose-the small and meek
    4:50 pm on February 12th, 2017

    HOH: Windows is not our friend in this house

  29. Rio - The Evil Pug
    4:56 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Quilt!…I had wanted very much to post about the amazing Quilt, which if you recall, has little baseballs sewn into it. These baseballs are actually miniature kameras which allow daily monitoring of our favorite author….snort!…I keep a log of how long he stares out the window and how long he actually tippity-taps on his keyboard with those big paws …chuffle!…Also I keep a log of his daily intake of Cahors wine. Boggles the mind actually…wheeze!…We can all thank Agent Wookie for hooking up those little baseball-kams…heh!heh!…The Quilt brings back a lot of good memories for me…wuffle!…Here is a link from Staff’s blog which details how the Quilt came into existence back in September 2010….sneeze!

  30. Wookie's and Teddy's Paw
    5:01 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Rio — Thanks for that, and my apologies to Dawson, who I missed when I gave my guided tour of the quilt. Good memories indeed.

  31. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:03 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Tour!…Guided Tour of the Quilt?…snort!…I must have missed that! I will go back to the Quilt Post and see if I can find it….wheeze!

  32. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:08 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Baseballs!….If you look closely at the squares which feature Wookie and AbbieTheKitty, you can see a few of those baseball-kams…heh!heh!…There is also one on Alice’s collar for some reason….chorkel!

  33. Rio - The Evil Pug
    5:29 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Books!…I know there are Alexander McCall Smith fans on this here blog. Have any of you read his series “44 Scotland Street”?…sniff!sniff!

  34. Beau - The Black Pug
    6:02 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Sneeze!…Rio pointed out to meez dat Rose has been asking how my eyebolz is feeling…snuffle!sneeze!…My eyebolz is healed up even doh I did not let dem guyz put dose nasty droplets in der….sniff!…But I do have trouble seeing clear because it healed kinda wiff a cloudy visable effect…gurgle!….It is not painful to meez anymore which is da best thing….sneeze!

  35. dawson
    6:04 pm on February 12th, 2017

    I’ve read the 44 Scotland Street books as well as most of Alexander McCall Smith’s other series. I enjoy all of them.

  36. dawson
    6:10 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Wookie’s and Teddy’s Paw: I didn’t even notice that you left me out of the guided tour.

    The fund-raising tea is over and lots of money made so time to rest. I took a small slice of the tip of a finger off while cutting cucumbers with a mandolin. Bled like crazy and hurts to type.

  37. Rio - The Evil Pug
    6:15 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Dawson!…We here just finished the third book in the series “Love Over Scotland” and loved it. …snort!…I could imagine myself busking with Bertie in Paris. Him on the Sax and me with my harmonica….chuffle! …It was the first out of that series for us. That dumb ole library never has a full series of anything…grumble!

  38. Wose-the small and meek
    6:40 pm on February 12th, 2017

    RIO! Thanks for posting the history of that beautiful quilt!

    Beau: I am very glad to read that your eye is feeling better! The only time anyone puts drops in my eyes is when I go for my annual eye test. Most of the drops wind up on my face instead of in the eye. Among my other phobias is the fear of tongue depressors.

    Dawson: Ouch!

  39. dawson
    7:34 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Rio: Are you watching the Grammy’s?

    I’m fading fast…a nap is in my zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

  40. Rio - The Evil Pug
    7:52 pm on February 12th, 2017


  41. Herd of Hounds
    8:13 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Dawson, the DDD brought a mandolin home today and used it to prepare dinner.
    He loves kitchen gadgets (almost as much as garage tool gadgets). Fortunately, no bits of fingers showed up in dinner.

  42. dawson
    8:20 pm on February 12th, 2017

    HOH: Heh!

    Looks like Dr Joe Carson took a second place in Montana sled dog race yesterday.

    My nap seems to have gotten postponed. Grump.

  43. Herd of Hounds
    8:29 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Dawson, yes! He came in second in the 100 mile race. Montana is still a long way from AK and the 1049 to Nome.

  44. BMALS
    8:39 pm on February 12th, 2017

    Bee, thank you for the response on my grammar question.

    I am not going to watch the Grammys. Heading to bed shortly.

  45. Masquers
    10:59 pm on February 12th, 2017

    No Grammy watching for us either. Someone here is on a mission to transfer movies via Roku to the bedroom TV.

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