Chetspeak On Sunday

“This is America,” Bernie said. “You’re welcome to your opinion.”

The biker dude turned to the biker gal beside him. Hey! She had the same kind of neck, thicker than her head. Had I ever seen that on a woman before? I was trying to remember when the biker dude spoke in a high little voice. “You’re welcome to your opinion.” The biker gal thought that was funny. So did a bunch of the other bikers, all of them now looking our way. “My point exactly, pretty boy,” the biker said, now back to his normal voice, rough and loud. “This. Is. America.”

Pretty boy? Was he agreeing with me that Bernie had the best face in the world? I went back and forth on that. Meanwhile the biker dude was saying, “Your piece of crap ride ain’t American. Makin’ you a traitor, as well as a sexual deviator.”

It got very quiet out on the deck at Ti-Pierre’s Cajun BBQ, so when Bernie spoke every word was clear. “You’re embarrassing yourself,” he said.

– from PAW AND ORDER.

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This entry was posted on Sunday, May 29th, 2016 at 8:37 am and is filed under Chet The Dog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

80 Responses to “Chetspeak On Sunday”

  1. Herd of Hounds
    8:46 am on May 29th, 2016

    Good morning, everyone! A good Chetspeak but we doubt that Bernie will ever learn not to have a battle of wits with the unarmed! Happy Egg Day, ours had a little bacon with it 🙂
    Enjoy the final Sunday of May..wowser, this month has gone fast.

  2. Rose-the small and meek
    8:48 am on May 29th, 2016

    Greetings, and Happy Egg Day!

    This Chetspeak made me laugh out loud, particularly since the “tough” biker dude spoke in “a high little voice.”

    Hope those in the path of extreme weather stay safe.

    On the WosenGrizz agenda for today…Going someplace that is air-conditioned. :^)

    Good day to all!

  3. Rose-the small and meek
    8:48 am on May 29th, 2016

    HOH: Youse beat me to first post!

  4. Barb, Maggie & Lucy
    9:02 am on May 29th, 2016

    Happy Egg Day and an early Happy Memorial Day. Honoring all those who have served.

    No eggs here today. Organic oatmeal with a little brown sugar and half and half. Yum!

    Everything seems to have survived the storm last night. No shredded plants, Thank Dog.

  5. Herd of Hounds
    9:03 am on May 29th, 2016

    Probably ’cause we typed faster (if not accurately).

  6. B.Stover
    9:30 am on May 29th, 2016

    Good morning Chet and all.

    (The biker dude’s normal voice is “rough and loud.”)

  7. Herd of Hounds
    10:00 am on May 29th, 2016

    Warm weather?

  8. BearSpiritDog
    10:17 am on May 29th, 2016

    Warm Weather? Not Here. But I’ll take the Bacon!

  9. Herd of Hounds
    10:19 am on May 29th, 2016

    BSD, bacon, coming right up for you!

  10. Tupper and Gilly
    10:20 am on May 29th, 2016

    Good morning all. Preparing for the onslaught of crazy relatives.
    Pray for us….

  11. Diane C.
    10:48 am on May 29th, 2016

    good Morning HOH, Rose, BM and L, B. Stover, BSD, T and G, and moose in picture (Sissy, where do you find these?)–Prayers for all needing them, and good wishes for all including all our beloved departed who live in our memories.
    Does anyone on this blog have insight into how to make bruises go away fast? I want to wear elbow-length sleeves Tuesday w/o having to resort to 12″ of bangles.
    Any and all suggestions appreciated.

  12. Tupper and Gilly
    10:50 am on May 29th, 2016

    Diane C – arnica gel, plus arnica tablets plus lots of water.

  13. Diane C.
    10:54 am on May 29th, 2016

    Rose–I wish Grizz the best for summer school. (I enjoyed it last year but it was intense and wore me out.) This year I’m spending summer as just an occasional librarian.
    Dawson–are those lilacs in yesterday’s car photo?

  14. Herd of Hounds
    10:58 am on May 29th, 2016

    DianeC. Mom has always bruised easily and we play rough so she just tries to ignore bruises but we researched T&G’s suggestion and it looks good. We know there are lots of health and herb stores in your neck of the woods so should be findable. As to the silly fotos…we’ll never tell 🙂

  15. dawson
    11:31 am on May 29th, 2016

    Bernie: Speaking truth to bikers.

    DianeC: Yes, those are lilacs. They have survived yesterday’s slush storm. Now it is raining.
    To get rid of bruises use a live leech applied to the bruise.

    Tupper and Gilly: Good luck with those crazy relatives of yours.

    Thinking of folks in Texas.

  16. BearSpiritDog
    11:45 am on May 29th, 2016

    Prayers for the Royals. Stay Strong!

    Dawson: YEEP!

  17. Diane C.
    12:08 pm on May 29th, 2016

    T and G and HOH–Thanks for the tip–I’ll try.
    Dawson–Thank you too, but I’ll hold off on the leeches for now (although I do know there’s at least one place in my county–and several in LA–that offer “leech theraphy”–slimy!)

  18. Staff
    12:16 pm on May 29th, 2016

    http://nature365.tv/may-29-2016/ wind chimes and birch trees

    Diane, One of my brothers found a leech when we lived in Indiana. My Dad would talk to us about how leech application would make bruises go away. Somehow the leech ‘escaped’ from the 5 gallon fish tank (w/o water) that it lived in. I always suspected Chris but it could have been Jon. No one has told yet.

    I use gentle massage to help a bruise go away because, like HOH, I bruise easily. And I own the bruise. I don’t hide it.

  19. Staff
    12:27 pm on May 29th, 2016

    I got a hug in the mail yesterday. It came with a beautiful feather. I love it. Now I have to decide, the feather or the bear claw. Yesterday I wore both.

  20. ALR
    1:10 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Diane, just to back up Tupper & Gilly’s Mom, arnica, yes. But I go with arnica cream. I recently took a fall which had my whole leg from the knee down badly bruised, as that leg hit a tree on the way down! I used arnica cream a few times a day and it really helped.

  21. BearSpiritDog
    1:21 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Staff: Love those Hugs from the Royal Mum!

    No.1 Son still marvels over the Magnificent Healing Bear we won in a past auction. He says it looks like it is worth thousands of dollars. We wholeheartedly agree.
    We do know the message she sent with it is Absolutely Priceless, and is something for which Nana continues to be Grateful.

  22. Masquers
    1:26 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Alice the Weather-forecaster: Kats know…yes, we do. ^..^

  23. Martha
    1:33 pm on May 29th, 2016

    I like what Bernie had to say. Don’t you just want to say that sometimes?

  24. Herd of Hounds
    1:42 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Masquers and Alice M. y’all are great weather kats!
    Martha, love the amazing dog comic 🙂

  25. Herd of Hounds
    1:55 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha, neat that you found Zeus in the “good dog” dog philosophy! We always knew it was the Donut that was troublemaker.

  26. Staff
    1:59 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Off to take flowers to the cemetary. And maybe eat out in the littel cafe in the town Jim’s parents are from. BBL

  27. dawson
    2:23 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Haha, Martha!

    Did I miss the low-down on whether Zeus was well behaved yesterday? And, what’s Donut ever done wrong? Heh!

  28. BooBear
    2:44 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Hello, guys! Here still after the third week with flooding rains. Luckily, none of the flooding has affected Mom but the hard, long rains can be intense. Friday we had another round and the northwest side of Houston got hammered with flooding. Some children were forced to spend the night in their schools. In an interview with one of the dads, he said he had tried everyway he could to get to the school to pick up his child. He did get to speak to his kid by phone. The kids were having a ball but the parents were very stressed.
    So far the flooding has only affected Mom by closing some streets since usually, after a day or so, the flood waters drain into the streams and bayous that enter into Lake Houston, which is very close to our house. Friday ended on a stormy night, yesterday was beautiful, today and tomorrow are supposed to be hot and humid but only minimal rain chances. YEAH!

  29. Herd of Hounds
    3:37 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Good to hear from BooBear. Thank you for the update and letting us know that y’all are safe.

  30. Masquers
    3:48 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Thanks for checking in, BooBear. We Plunderers were worrit hearing of all the rain.
    btw…did your mom send a SDD yesterday?..we didn’t open it..somehow it just didn’t look like you.

  31. BearSpiritDog
    3:50 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha: Love the Husky Cartoon!

    Yes, O’Howlers, We all want to know. Was Zeus a Good Boy yesterday?

  32. Masquers
    4:25 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Staff: Paws up…the Mariners are playing the Twins. If you and Mr. Fireslippers are right, this should be an easy one.

  33. BooBear
    4:34 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Masquers, no email from me. So aggravating that hackers have nothing better to do!

  34. Tupper and Gilly
    5:09 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Whew! They’re gone.

    It was exhausting. They are sooooooo crazy. And embarrassing. we may never be able to go back to the sushi place again.

    Staff – so glad the hug got there in one piece. Sometimes hugs are fragile. Feathers not so much.

    Martha – we love the cartoon. But we always know who Mama is talking about when she asks who the good dog is. And it ain’t Gilly.

  35. Diane C.
    5:35 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Staff, ALR–thanks for the additional input. I’ll let you know how it turns out.
    Staff–I vote for wearing both.

  36. Riö – The Evil Pug
    5:41 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Staff!….Who is Jim?…grunt!…Oh, that must be Mr FireSlippers nickname…chuffle!…Hope he lives up to it…heh!

  37. Riö – The Evil Pug
    5:45 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Cemetery!…Beau and I got to go to the cemetery this morning. It was touch and go, but I swear I did not pee on any gravestones….sniff!…Beau on the other paw…heh!…Whose a bad boy?…snort!

  38. Thieves!
    6:35 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Rio: are you dehydrated? Why didn’t you say so? We will blur by with the vat o’ beer.

  39. Barb, Maggie & Lucy
    6:48 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Glad to hear from Boobear’s mom.

    Staff, nice phot of the necklace. I love it.

    Good to know T & G’s folks made it thru the visitor from hell.

    BSD, where are you folks moving? I don’t recall details, other then that it will be in a few months, and south of were you are now, I believe.

  40. Herd of Hounds
    6:53 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Rio has the 3 “B’s” tonight…baseball, beer and Beau. What a life!

  41. Riö – The Evil Pug
    7:39 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Giants!…Winnit…sniffle!…Well now we are sitting on the porch with Mr.FireSlippers feeling low. Only good thought is the Rockies are still doing better than the Twinkies…snort!…But Boston has now taken the lead in the American League….gah!…I bet Spencer is happy as a clam…sniff!

  42. Riö – The Evil Pug
    7:43 pm on May 29th, 2016

    May!….I keep slapping my flat head! It is ONLY May…heh!heh!….Anything and everything can happen in baseball. You’ve heard it many times and I’m telling youse again…snort!…Anything can happen over the next 5 months of Baseball! Count’em! 2 + 2 + 1 +++ …heh!heh!

  43. Thieves!
    8:34 pm on May 29th, 2016

    2+2+1 months of baseball means we’re going to need a bigger vat. Burp!

  44. Masquers
    8:39 pm on May 29th, 2016

    and a lot more pies! Heh.

  45. Riö – The Evil Pug
    8:43 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Season!…It’s a long season thank Dawg!…snort!

  46. Masquers
    8:51 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Someones are happy tonight…could it be the staff of Alice & Abbie and Keiko & Henry?

  47. Martha
    8:54 pm on May 29th, 2016

    So tomorrow is Memorial Day and several of the small towns in our school district have parades and services, which I think is great. Zoe, India, some of my children, and I will sit on my front porch and watch the 10 minute parade. Who really works hard are our school bands. The HS band will play the biggest town. The seventh and eighth grade band plays one town at 9:30 and my town at 11:45. My older son in the pipes and drums band will be playing in a city in the northern part of the county. Whew!

    In other news, I am glad that Boobear is okay. I saw that piece about the elementary school on the news. Wow.

    T&G’s Mama, I am glad you all survived. I am sure the Sushi place will forgive and forget… Someday.

  48. Masquers
    8:56 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha: Lol.

  49. Herd of Hounds
    9:04 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha, we think it’s splendid that the schools are so involved in a national holiday. But oh my goodness all of the coming and going must make you want to tear your hair out! Enjoy your parades.

  50. Thieves!
    9:09 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha: You say sushi places are forgiving? We may have to pay them a visit.

  51. Riö – The Evil Pug
    9:25 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Thieves!…No!

  52. Riö – The Evil Pug
    9:26 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Fifty!…I had to do it. I am not in the mood to kiss anyone, especially those Thieves…grunt!

  53. Riö – The Evil Pug
    9:27 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Walk!….We went for a walk but it is windy and cold outside…sniff!…What the Hell!?…grump!

  54. Mpop and Loulou's Mom
    9:29 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Tomorrow night the Stanley’s Cup finals begin. Just put baseball aside for a bit. I am an old time hockey fan and I jut want to say, give me a break, San Jose has no ice. What were they thinking?

  55. Thieves!
    9:47 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Rio: We were going to post fifty so our Lady could get a slurpy pug kiss from youse. She thinks they are special.

  56. Barb, Maggie & Lucy
    9:54 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Martha, Do you have three kids?

    Amalia, Give us the gory details.

  57. Ole Doc
    9:55 pm on May 29th, 2016

    We of the Outlaw litter have long suspected that Wyatt is adopted. As of last night, I have proof positive that this is the case. My Lady lifted Wyatt onto the big bed—yes, the same big bed I have had my eyes on for ages—thinking he might enjoy it. But what was this? In the middle of the night she carried him back downstairs to his pillow. She said he didn’t sleep, just stared at her from his spot on the big bed. He promptly fell asleep once on his pillow. Wyatt, Wyatt, Wyatt—getting lifted on the big bed without even asking—what a missed opportunity. I have so much to teach him.

  58. Staff
    10:07 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Is this the same Wyatt who kept his paw on ‘My Lady’ during the escape from the fire? We notice a similarity.

  59. Riö – The Evil Pug
    10:13 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Wyatt!…What-up?…sniff!…None of us, meaning Me and Beau get to sleep on the big bed anymore…grump!…Beau ruined it by always wanting OFF!OFF!OFF! to check on Mother while she was recovering from that darn stroke….sniff!…Hey, today is the One Year anniversary of that horrible day by they way…guffle!…My friend feels she has aged big time for some reason…yeeep!

  60. Riö – The Evil Pug
    10:15 pm on May 29th, 2016

    MollysMaw!…Just for you we will watch the Stanley Cup Finals…snort!…We here like Hockey too. It over laps with baseball…so therefore…sneeze!

  61. Martha
    10:15 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Yes, three kids. My daughter, married, with the cutie bug daughter. Older son, mechanical engineer, sports guy who lacerated his kidney. Younger son, only one living at home, graduating from community college this Friday!

  62. Tupper and Gilly
    10:55 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Gory details? Too many to count.
    Let’s put it this way – there were cold shrimp on ice. Both crazy aunt and uncle got some. But then while we were eating, they told us not to try the shrimp cuz they tasted “funny”. That’s when I realized they hadn’t PEELED the shrimp, just tried to eat them with the shell on.

    Martha – hope your parades can happen. They have cancelled the one in our town due to the weather report

  63. Ole Doc
    11:13 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Staff: It is the same Wyatt. Why, oh, why didn’t my Lady lift me on the big bed? Why!

    Royal: I just snorted water out of my nose. Shells on! Heh.

  64. Thieves!
    11:19 pm on May 29th, 2016

    We wonder if Mother is as forgiving as sushi places? We should pay her a visit to say how grateful we are that Beau kept an eye on her this past year. Maybe she will be in a Slim Jim sharing mood.

  65. Tupper and Gilly
    11:19 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Doc – we have decided this is our new slogan around here when someone does something incredibly stupid.
    “PEEL THE SHRIMP!”

  66. Staff
    11:22 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Rio’s friend, Dawson and I know what you are going through and want you to know our thoughts and pawrayers are with you every day. Take care friend.

  67. Ole Doc
    11:28 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Royals: Eating shrimp with the shells is like eating kibble without opening the bag. Sure, it can be done, but takes away from the experience.

  68. Tupper and Gilly
    11:35 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Doc – if we tell you that episode was one of the less embarrassing parts of the afternoon, does it give you the picture?

  69. Ole Doc
    11:46 pm on May 29th, 2016

    A picture so entertaining, I wish I had popcorn. Heh.

  70. c.hobbit
    11:49 pm on May 29th, 2016

    Well the day had been sunny and hot until about 6 pm. Then black clouds moved in and we had a very rare thunder and lightning storm accompanied by sheets of rain. Dogs in the neighborhood were howling and yelping in fear. Oddly enough I had spent the entire afternoon deep watering the back yard. Of course I had also left the sun roof on my car ajar so let the hot air exit and there was no way to get to it until the downpour became a normal rain.

    I’ve gone on 2 hikes in 2 days to start gearing up for my next hiking trip in mid-June.

    I hope everyone has a good day tomorrow. Take care.

  71. Ole Doc
    12:31 am on May 30th, 2016

    Sleep tight, Slim Jims.

  72. Zoe Montague
    1:13 am on May 30th, 2016

    Memorial Day tomorrow..really starting now I guess. Will write then.

  73. Diane C.
    7:51 am on May 30th, 2016

    Ole Doc–You are always welcome to blur down here and share the really big bed with me, Ms. Pretty and Edgar. Once you all get to know each other there should be plenty of room.
    Amalia–I can only shudder. Dare I ask for even a hint of one of the more embarrassing moments?

    I had coordinates for seeing the International Space Station last night and then forgot about it. Drat! It really is beautiful to see…Good Memorial Day Morning, all…

  74. Zeusiköv
    7:58 am on May 30th, 2016

    Update: Martha already found the story of my life: I AM A GOOD BOY!
    The meeting with the new homeowners’ 5-month old pup went very well. Of course, Meahka and Kat and The Donut all know how to meet and greet with manners. But hey! It turns out I do too!! That little(!!!!) girl was not at all afraid of old Zeus. No reason. Her maw would not take her off leash, since she doesn’t know anything about invisible fence yet. And her paw insisted that I stay on a leash because he was afraid that Kerrina would flip put. Why? I have no idea, except someone mentioned something about her possibly being in heat. Did I notice? Nope! So here is where it gets interesting: At some point, Bella and I ran out of the door when we weren’t supposed to. I ran up to that big 60-pound pup, gave her a little nose greeting, greeted the man and lady, and then I proceeded up to the barn to do my business. Totally professional. Mom and Pop were so proud of me.

  75. Barb, Maggie & Lucy
    8:21 am on May 30th, 2016

    Good for you, Zeus. But why would you be interested? Do you still have all your parts? I think not.

    Highly, highly unusual for a large breed female to come into heat at 5 months. Usually first heat is 6-9 months, and most often towards the later. Maybe they just wanted a good excuse.

  76. Zeusiköv
    8:24 am on May 30th, 2016

    Barb, I have all my parts for sure: Brain (check). Brawn (check). Heart (check). Stomach (double-check). What else is there?

    That dude thinks he is some sort of dog expert. I think he is full-of-youknowwhat. Heh!

  77. Rose-the small and meek
    8:44 am on May 30th, 2016

    Who’s a good, good boy? Zeusikov!

  78. BearSpiritDog
    9:11 am on May 30th, 2016

    Barb,Magpie,Lucy: Sometime in the next few months we are Moving to Seattle.

    Zeus: We had No Doubt you would be on your Best Behavior.

    Good Morning DianeC and Wose!

  79. Masquers
    9:14 am on May 30th, 2016

    T&G: Love your new motto!

    Yikes! Sorry about your car, Hobbit.

    Have a good Memorial Day everyone.

  80. Herd of Hounds
    9:39 am on May 30th, 2016

    Just because Zeus is a sports model, doesn’t mean he isn’t interested!

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