Politics, whatever that is, sure gets humans going. We had a party last night, all kinds of people there, cops, the D.A., Prof from down at the college, Suzie and a whole bunch from the Tribune, maybe a perp or two out on bail. A big argument started up – what does TARP mean, by the way? – and Bernie stepped into the middle. He said, “I’m sick of the whole thing.” Then he read this: “No person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty-five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.”
“So what?” someone said.
“So,” said Bernie, “it doesn’t say you have to be among the living. Therefore I’m writing in A. Lincoln in 2012. That’s who we need.”
There was a silence. Then everyone got back to being in a good mood. Bernie’s always the smartest human in the room. People forget that sometimes, a complete mystery to me.
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